What did they call prehistoric sailing disasters? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
What do birds like to put in their soup? Crow-tons.
What did one pig say to the other?
Let’s be pen pals.
What kind of dinosaur works for the police? A trisara-cop.
Why are parrots so loyal? They are a man of their bird!
What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
A croaker spaniel.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks: “Is this stool taken?”
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
Whenever I go to a zoo, I only ever see dogs.
They were Shiht-zus.
What do you say when you catch a bee?
Behold!
What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear-faced lyre.
What is a seals favorite subject?
Art Art Art Art!
How can you tell if there's a dinosaur in the refrigerator ? The door won't close!
A slow poke is what you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine.
What's a sheep's favorite art style?
Baa's Relief
It’s easy to spot a sad flamingo. They get really blue.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.
What do you get when you cross a lion with a parrot?
I don't know, but when it talks, you better listen.
What do you call an ant running away with another ant?
Ant-elope.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
The sheep says to the shepherd "you're an jerk and I hate you!" and the shepherd says "Say what?"
And the sheep goes "You herd me!"
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
A flamingo can be a really good friend to have. However, they generally fit the bill really well.
What do you call a Pig with three eyes?
Piiig.
How many mosquito's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 2, no idea how they got there.
A sunburned murder of crows is referred to as 1st, 2nd and 3rd degree.
How do you say farewell to a very optimistic insect?
Buoyant!
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
People always talk about the 'Eye Of The Tiger'. No one talks about the other four letters.
How do you apologize to a sloth? BEAR your heart and soul.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
Who makes dinosaur clothes? dino-sewer.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
What is a medieval owl called?
A knight owl.
What’s a shark’s favorite bible story?
Noah’s Shark.
Why is it hard to carry on a conversation with a goat?
Because they are always butting in.
How do worms measure their length?
They ask a tape worm to help out!
I told my husband that the National Zoo's sloth bear gave birth but ate two of the three babies. He said "now she's guilty of 2 deadly sins: sloth and gluttony."
What do you call a lazy crayfish?
A slobster.
How do you know when a baby koala bear is happy? You’ll see them jump for joey!
A priest is the best catch for a tiger as they like to prey.
What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
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