What do you call a parrot without feathers? Bald!
What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell?
Addercadabra and abradacobra.
Why wasn’t the giraffe invited to the party?
He was a pain in the neck.
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
Because they got turtle recall, turtles never forget.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What do you call a maternal Turkish robot water weasel?
An Ottoman otter-mom automaton.
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you.
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
Two European frogs discuss their ancestry
"So, are you a complete french frog?"
"No. I'm a tad-pole."
What do you do if a rabbit keeps pooping in your yard? Take him to a pellet court.
What does an owl need after having a bath?
A t-owl.
What do you call a turtle chef?
A slow cooker.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
Did you hear what happened to the Energizer Bunny? He got arrested for Battery.
How do you make a glow worm happy?
Cut off his tail, he’ll be de-lighted!
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk?
Dirty looks from the mouse!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
Why was the snake mad at the jewel thief?
Because he wanted his diamondback.
What kind of musical instrument do mice play? A mouse organ! Why do mice have long tails? Well, they'd look silly with long hair!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
Crows love Cawnie Chung, their favorite reporter.
Do you think you know more parrot jokes than me? Toucan play that game!
Jellyfish and peanut butterare sea turtles favorite sandwich.
Whoever lives by the sword shell die by it.
What do you call a three-eyed tiger?
A tiiiger.
What do you call a monkey who can’t keep a secret?
A blab-boon.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What soccer position does a pink flamingo play? Flamingoalie.
What kind of fish do you find in a bird cage?
A perch!
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
What do llamas always reply when you thank them?
No probllama.
What do you call it when evil worms take over the world?
Global Worming!
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
Why did the giant ape climb up the side of the skyscraper?
Because the elevator was broken.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
What's as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing? Her shadow!
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
A camel can work all week without drinking..
A man can drink all week without working.
I saw a sheep covered in plastic
It was lambinated.
That raven is so stubborn at times, he just needs to crow up.
What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Tyrannosaurus wrecks!
Which birds go to church a lot?
Birds of pray.
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