Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Q: Why did the tiger eat the lamp?
A: He wanted a light lunch.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
What is the head of an Italian dinosaur family called? Ptera Don
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
What is one of the big tiger's most favorite hangout places? A shopping maul.
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
I met this really beautiful crustacean, but I lobst her number.
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area.
What was the first car Henry Fordasaurus invented? A Model T-Rex.
A zoo owner introduced his tiger to the visitors by saying "this is the most paw-some tiger at the zoo".
Where does a dinosaur lay in the sun? At the dino-shore
TIL that, on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
What do worms leave round their baths?
The scum of the earth!
You must be the Easter Bunny, because you’ve got me all egg-cited.
What do sharks order at McDonalds?
A quarter flounder.
What do you call a rabbit that has fleas?
Bugs bunny.
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
I've just thought of a really funny owl joke, but I can't use it until 2/8/20.
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
What do you call a goat on a mountain?
Hillbilly.
If there's a bee in my hand, then what's in my eye?
Beauty.
Beauty is in the eye of the bee holder.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
A crow was arrested under suspicion of murder. The case was closed, as the judge said he had just caws.
What did the Mountain lion say to the bathroom attendant?
Out of the way, I’m about to Puma pants!
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tell it a funny Halloween joke and see which end laughs!
When I was younger, I dressed up as a frog and robbed a bank.
That was the first time that I Kerm-itted a crime.
Which color is a zebra's base color? The debate is endless, and there is no clear answer.
It both is and isn't a black-and-white issue.
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
What kind of music do sophisticated frogs listen to?
Hopera.
Why was the crow upset about his job? The HR fired the crow with no caws.
What do you call a crab that throws things?
Lobster
If a lamb and tiger were crossed, you would end up with a striped sweater.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
What does a dog wear when it’s cold outside?
A pet-ticoat.
A woman tried to order an exotic snake online, but was surprised to find that when the package arrived, it contained only feathered scarves.
What’s black and white and stands in the corner?
A naughty panda.
What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night?
You didn’t turnout.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
Did you hear about the kid that ate a whole pack of candy worms?
It’s a sour tale!
A fight between tiger and lion broke out. Both of them wanted to become the next empe-roar of the jungle.
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