What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game?
For playing dirty.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet.
I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
What happened when the pig pen broke?
They had to use the pig pencil.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
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