What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.