What kind of books do owls read?
Hoo-dunnits.
Why do owls shower so often?
So they don’t smell fowl.
What's the most common form of owl-on-owl violence?
Drive by hooting.
My pet owl will soon turn 180.
He's not old, he just has a bad neck.
Did you hear the gossip about the owl who hooked up with his boss?
I won’t tell you hoo.
What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
Why did the owl 'owl?
Because the Woodpecker would peck 'er.
Why shouldn’t you tell an owl your secrets?
They’re always talon everyone.
What did the owl’s valentine say?
You are hootiful.
What happens if an owl doesn't wash?
It smells fowl.
What does an owl with an attitude have?
A scowl.
What do you get when you cross an owl with an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom.
An owl had a sore throat but wasn't bothered.
He couldn't give a hoot.
What sits in a tree and says "Hoots mon, hoots mon?"
A Scottish owl.
Why did the owl join Tinder?
He didn’t want to be owl by himself.
What was the owl’s favorite Whitney Houston song?
Owl always love you.
What do you call an owl dressed in armor?
A knight owl.
What kind of gang violence is common among owls?
A drive by hooting.