Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
How did the horse break into the mainframe?
It was a hack.
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What does a horse do when it smells rotten seafood?
It scallops outta there.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
Why was the horse feeling a bit sick?
Its voice was a bit hoarse.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
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