Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.
How long has this been going on?
Since I was a kid.
You have goat to be kidding me.
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
Why is it hard to carry on a conversation with a goat?
Because they are always butting in.
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
Why are goats from France musical?
Because they have French horns.
Is a goat that eats office supplies on a staple diet?
What do goats eat?
Goatmeal.
Who called it a goat petting zoo...
and not Close Encounters of the Herd Kind?
What do you call a goat on a mountain?
Hillbilly.
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
Whatever floats your goat.
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
Goat milk?
When milking a nervous goat, you should use kid gloves.
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
Why are goats and rhinos attracted to each other?
Because they are both horny animals.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
What do you call a goat who is in charge of a university?
Billy Dean.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
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