What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation? To the dino-shore.
How can you tell where the Easter Bunny has been? Eggs mark the spot.
What kind of fish will help you hear?
A herring aid!
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What is the funniest fish in the sea?
A clownfish.
What did the duck eat for snack?
Salted Quackers.
How do you catch an electric eel?
You can catch an electric eel with a lightning rod!
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
The flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage was a true definition of murder most foul.
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
What do dogs say when something cool happens?
Paw-some.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
A crocodile tried to copy a rooster to wake his friends one morning, he went croc-a-doodle do.
What is the name of the final exam you take when studying bird law? The crow bar.
What did the duck say when the waitress came?
Put it on my bill.
What do you call luggage made of snakeskin?
Ex-hiss baggage.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
You can catch a lot of flies with honey
But you'll catch more honeys being fly.
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What’s striped and bouncy?
A tiger on a pogo stick!
What’s long, green and goes hith?
A snake with a lisp.
Did You Hear About The Duck Who Thought He Was a Squirrel?
It was one tough nut to quack.
I was riding my bike through the countryside when I was attacked by a herd of sheep!
Fortunately, I was only grazed.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
My sheep-powered computer was starting to run slowly
So I added more ram
Why are snakes hard to fool?
They have no legs to pull.
You must be the Easter Bunny, because you’ve got me all egg-cited.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
When it’s raining, a turtle goes to a shell-ter.
What do bees call wasps?
Wanna-bees.
What do you call a bird that can fix anything?
Duck Tape.
I just learned how to speak parrot.
I just learned how to speak parrot.
What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Ant-ten-eye.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
That was ruff.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
When is a turkey scary?
When it's a goblin.
Is it true that a dinosaur won't attack if you hold a tree branch? That depends on how fast you carry it!
What's the difference between Cloepatra and King Arthur?
One had Camelot and one had a lot of camels.
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