What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
I read a story about pig anatomy.
It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.