How does a lobster answer the phone?
"Shello?"
I met this really beautiful crustacean, but I lobst her number.
here do lobsters go to borrow money? The prawn broker.
Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...
Once upon a time there was this lobster...
The lobster is one shell of an animal.
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
Have you seen my lobster?
I'm worried he might by a lost claws.
What do you call a lobster that's afraid of tight spaces?
Claw-strophobic
What’s the difference between a greyhound station and a lobster with a boob job?
One’s a crusty bus-station, the other’s a busty crustacean.
My lobster's name is:
Claude
What do you call a lobster with a Christmas hat?
Santa Claws
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea-weed.
What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?
Ones a crustaecian and the other is a crushed Asian.
What do you get if you cross a lobster with a telephone?
A snappy talk.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.