What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
Why did the horse like her new backpack?
The straps were adju-stable.
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
Why was the horse feeling a bit sick?
Its voice was a bit hoarse.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
What does a horse do when it smells rotten seafood?
It scallops outta there.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
How does a horse get a suit fitted?
With a tail-or.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
Where do horses get their weaves from?
Mane.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
Why couldn’t the baby horse eat dessert?
It was foal.