What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What’s happens to the sportiest horse?
It gets to be first horse-pick of the draft.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
How did the horse get up the stairs?
He mounted them.
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
What does a horse do when it smells rotten seafood?
It scallops outta there.
What were the ponies most excited for in the meal?
The main horse.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
How did the horse break into the mainframe?
It was a hack.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
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