What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
Have you ever heard of Pavlov’s dog?
Yeah, he rings a bell
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
What do you call an old dog?
Grandpaw.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
Sorry we missed puppy class.
My dog was wagging. There goes his oppawtunity for pawfect attendance…
What type of dog would be the best at portraying Tina Turner?
An Angela Bassett Hound.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
What’s a dog’s favorite condiment?
Fetch-up.
What did the dog order at a restaurant?
His owner’s homework.
What is worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
I went to the Veterinarian today.
She really knew how to make my dog heal.
What is the poshest breed of dog?
A Cavalier King Charles Spaniel.
What do you call a dog that sneezes?
Achoo-huahua.
What makes more noise than a dog barking outside your window?
Two dogs barking outside your window.
What happens when you cross an Australian dog and a Beatle?
Dingo Starr.
What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
That was ruff.
What do you call someone who loves dogs?
A pug addict.
My neighbor had way too many dogs.
It’s safe to say that he had a Rover-dose.
Why do dogs hate computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of those Windows.
What type of dog is best at timekeeping?
A watch dog.
Why do dogs find it hard to work the TV remote?
Because they always hit the paws button.
What do you call someone who always takes pictures of their dog?
A pup-arazzi.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
Which dog won the race? A weiner dog.
I recently got two German Shepherds. Because
I wanted some paw-dy guards.
What is a dog’s favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas.
My dog loves poetry.
Especially William Shakes-paw.
My dog won’t get off the PlayStation He’s been playing Fi-fur all day.
What kind of dog loves bubble baths?
A shampoodle.
What dog does Dracula own?
A blood-hound.
What’s a dog’s favorite breakfast?
Woofles.
What do you get when you cross a Sheepdog with a jelly?
The collie wobbles.
What is a dog’s favorite vegetable? A collie flower.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
What happens when you buy a dog from the blacksmith?
When he gets home he’ll make a bolt for the door.
What is a dog’s favorite movie series?
Fifty shades of Greyhound.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
Where do dogs go after the their tails fall off?
The re-tail store.
What breed of dog always gets cold?
A Bichon Freeze.
I asked my dog why he was having a bad day.
But all he said was “ruff”.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
How do you stop your dog from barking in your front yard?
Put him in your backyard.
What was Muhammad Ali’s favorite breed of dog?
A boxer.
Whenever I go to a zoo, I only ever see dogs.
They were Shiht-zus.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
Konnichihuahua.
How do fleas get from place to place?
By itch-hiking.
What type of dog chases anything red?
A bull dog.
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
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