Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want — he can’t hear you.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
Did Rudolph go to school?
No, he was elf taught!
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
Q. Which game do hunters go after first?
A. The nearest and the deerest.
How much does it cost to fly Santa’s sleigh?
About 9 bucks.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.