Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Did Rudolph go to school?
No, he was elf taught!
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
Q. After the stripper is done, what happens at a stag party?
A. Deer-ty dancing.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elka Seltzer.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
Q. Which kind of deer has a serious drinking problem?
A. The elk-oholic.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
How much does it cost to fly Santa’s sleigh?
About 9 bucks.
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What did the deer say to his friend during their night in the woods?
This is so much fawn!
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
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