Why don't crabs donate to charity?
They're shellfish penny pinchers.
What do you call a crab that throws things?
Lobster
Did you hear about the psychic hermit crab?
Makes shell-fulfilling prophecies.
I got in a fight with a crab yesterday.
When I punched him he ran, goon.
Hermit crabs’ house phones were always shell phones
My two pet crabs have very different personalities. One is always in a good mood, but the other can be a bit of a grump.
Their names are crabA and crabB
A crab didn't help his friend,
he's shellfish.
How can you tell if a crab is drunk?
It walks straight
How come Crabs never share with their friends?
Because they're Shellfish.
How does a crab go when it's right?
"Aw, snap!"
Do You Know How Crabs Get Around On Land?
They Use The Sidewalk!
How do crabs evade taxes?
They set up shell corporations.
What is the difference between a dirty bus stop, and a crab with breast implants?
Ones a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean!
Where do crabs invest their money?
A sea bank.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a large chested crab?
One’s a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean
Why don't crabs give birthday presents?
Because they're just shellfish.
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they're shellfish.
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish.
What kind of helmet does a hermit crab wear?
A shell-met!
Thinking about selling my crab so i could make money. Then I realised "am I really this shellfish"?
I went to the Chinese buffet on crab leg night and ate my fill, but they kicked me out.
They said I was being too shellfish.
Why was the crab embarrassed?
Because the sea weed.
What’s the difference between a gross bus stop and a crab with large breasts?
One’s a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.
Why don’t crabs donate to charity?
Because they’re shellfish
There was a weird Crab
Whenever he used to walk, his claws used to make a ta-ta-ta-ta sound.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a crab with boobs?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Overheard on a bus... What do you call a social hermit crab?
Just a crab.
How do you know when a crab's drunk?
When it starts walking straight
If a crab worked in a pizza parlor, which station would it work?
The crust station.
Why didn’t the lobster and crab share their lunch with an octopus?
Because they are too shellfish.
What do a crab, a lobster, and a Japanese guy run over in the middle of the road all have in common?
They're all Crushed-Asians!
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