When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
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