What is yellow and goes bzzzzzz? An electric banana.
How does Bob Marley like his donuts?
Wi’ jam in.
I was going to tell you a joke about an egg but it's not all it's cracked up to be.
Why did the crazy man lose his job at the dairy factory? He was a danger to himself and udders.
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
My friend Jack claims that he can communicate with vegetables.
Jack and the beans talk.
What did mamma orange say to little orange after he spilled his milk? It’s no big peel!
I took the recent snow warnings with a pinch of salt.
Why are acorns bad at telling jokes? Because they tend to be acorn-y.
You can never make a crumble with just 3.14 strawberries because that would make a pi.
What did one cherry say to the other cherry? If you weren't so tasty we wouldn't be in this jam.
I came across a man who was eating strawberries at the bank. He told me he wanted to eat rich food.
Q: What would a peach love to pet?
A: A Pit Bull.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
What happens to Germans when they eat too many lemons?
They become sour krauts.
Dog Joke: What do you call a Collie with a mango on it's back?
Mango Lassie.
Why did the orange go out with a prune? He couldn’t find a date.
My father is a farmer who grows strawberries. However, his business has recently gone into liquidation after he made smoothies.
I am a peach, and when my husband accompanies me, we are a pear.
My biology class was going on and on, and I was stuck in the middle of it. Well, you know, this is how it feels to be an on-i-on.
What beer does everyone at the orphanage drink?
Foster's.
Pigs, when out in public, have to keep an eye on their valuables as they are vulnerable to pigpockets.
How do monkeys get down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-ster.
What does a caped monkey superhero drive?
A banana-mobile.
What's the manliest fruit to eat?
Mango.
The orange juice industry is not doing very well.
Tomorrow they will give a special press release.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
Why was the coffee-shop worker fired? He kept showing up in a Tea-shirt.
Last time I was in France I wanted to ask a question about strawberries
But I wasn't sure how to fraise it.
Sometimes a pea starts acting like a diva. We call them a pea-Madonna.
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A candy baa.
Why do basketball players love cookies? Because they can dunk them!
Where do you go to learn how to make ice cream?
Sundae school.
What are the best vegetables to sleep under?
a can of peas.
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
What do you call a chicken with a piece of lettuce in its eye? Chicken Caesar Salad
Hey you like cherry preserves ?
Never mind, its probably not your jam
How good is a Coney Island gyro? Feta than se*.
Did you hear about the pick-up artist who only ever wears green leaves on his head? Yeah, he’s definitely a pineapple smoothie.
Who wrote the book "Great Egg-spectations"?
Charles Chickens.
Are you a vegan?
'Cause I yam.
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
What do cannibals eat for dessert? Chocolate covered aunts.
Some people have to stop telling meat puns, because they simply butcher every single joke.
What happened to the pig who liked pineapple? He turned into a porky-pine!
Wondering about a peach's favorite movie? Well it has to be the 'King's Peach'.
Why did the orange fall out of the tree?
It went out on a limb.
What do you call a punctual citrus fruit?
A Clockwork Orange.
Q: Why were the two green pea plants so close?
A: They had deep roots.
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