I have so mushroom in my heart for you.
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness?
He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A piZZZZZZa.
What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song?
Slice, Slice Baby
What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle?
Fold me close.
Why does Satan not eat the bread part of the pizza?
Because he's the Anti-Crust!
I burnt my Hawaiian pizza.
I should have used aloha temperature.
What did the pizza say when it asked the topping out on a date?
I never sausage a beautiful face.
Join us and let’s make pizza cheese grate again.
Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties?
Because he’s such a fungi!
What is a pizza’s favorite movie?
Pie hard.
How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste.
I have been trying to write a new pizza joke…
But I can’t work out the delivery.
What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas?
Cheeses Crust.
This pizza party is the perfect topping to a great summer.
What is the best way to stop a pizza curling?
Hide its brush.
Why did the man go into the pizza business?
He wanted to make some dough.
Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
“You don’t pepper-own me.”
…and what did the delivery guy say in reply?
“Hey now, don’t get saucy.”
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A weir-dough.
What does a pizza wear to smell good?
Calzogne.
“Waiter, will my pizza be long?”
“No sir, it will be round!”
hat did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza?
“Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you!”
I had a goat’s cheese pizza the other day.
He wasn’t happy.
What do pizza delivery guys and porn stars both see too much of?
Stiff tips.
What did the doughnut say to the pizza?
If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn’t be hanging around this hole.
Damn, look at that pizza! It's an over panchiever.
What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you?
Slice to meet you.
You and I make a deluxe combo.
What does an anteater like on its pizza?
Ant-chovies.
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
How can you tell if you are in love?
If they stole a pizza your heart.
What did the pepperoni say to the cook?
You wanna pizza me?
Why did the hipster burn his lips?
He ate his pizza before it was cool.
What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella?
Sorry but I am too mature for you.
Join us for a slice of fun.
Pizza: the only time top-less isn't fun
Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
Because they kneaded the dough!
the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?
My pizza jokes can’t be topped!
What pizza do dogs eat?
Puperoni.
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
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