I hope we're not being too cheesy when we say you're gouda love our cheese puns!

Cheese Puns

How does the Cheese Detective choose his clients?
On a queso by queso basis.
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
Why do cheeses make bad musicians?
They’re always sharp.
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
Why did the cheese lover hide cheese in the back of his fridge?
In queso emergency.
What does a piece of cheese tell you during a game of tag?
Cheez it.
What do you call a flying cheese?
A curd of prey.
Did you hear about the guy who forgot to use the colander when making mac and cheese?
His wife gave him a restraining order.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
What happens when you go on an all-cheese diet?
You cheddar few pounds.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite musician?
Mozart-arella.
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
Why did the cheese shop owner finally quit the business?
He was tired of the daily rind.
What does a cheese say when you ask him to share a secret?
He cantal.
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
What hotel do cheese lover’s stay in?
The Stilton.
What is a cannibal’s favorite cheese?
Limb-burger.
Did you hear about the cheese lover who took his girlfriend for granted?
How dairy.
How did the cheese get such curly hair?
It got a permasan.
Who were the first cheese lovers ever?
Edam and Eve.
What drives cheese crazy?
That everyone around them is crackers.