Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
We’re a perfect mash.
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
I love you a tot!
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”