What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
I like you a latke!
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
We’re a perfect mash.
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
Time fries when you’re having fun!
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
I love you a tot!
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
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