What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
Remember to stop and smell the rosé.
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
Why do we love wine puns?
Because they're grape!
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
"I mead more wine."
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
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I’m not old. I’m aged to perfection. And full bodied.
"You can't sip with us."
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine. I added fruit and orange juice, and now she sangria than ever!
What does a cat lady say on Friday night?
I am drinking wine and feline fine!
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
Did you hear about the little grape who didn’t want to be made into wine?
Unfortunately, he was pressed into service!
"My day just went from super to sip-erb, real quick."
Wine if you must. It’s not good to bottle up your emotions.
Did you hear about the crime family that took over the wine importing business?
They call themselves the Sip-ranos!
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
"Rosé all day."
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
How can you tell a wine taster is a newbie?
By the blanc look on her face.
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
Wino Woe: Forgive me, for I have zinned!
What should you do with an old inventory of fine French wine?
Liquidate it to the highest bidder.
"Say you'll be wine."
Which mammal absolutely loves Merlot and Cabernet?
The Wineoceros.
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
Vine Thought of the Day: Choosy moms choose wine!
"Back that glass up."
Why was the white wine's off-beat pun so boo-ed?
Because it was too corky.
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
"I need to re-wine my life."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
"Love the wine you're with."
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
"You are so bottlefull to me."
"You're the wine that I want."
"Sip happens."
"Great minds drink alike."
You’re wine in a million.
Why did the wine connoisseur insist on drinking from an old tire?
He heard it was a Goodyear!
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
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