"Say you'll be wine."
"Back that glass up."
"Partners in wine."
Why was the white wine's off-beat pun so boo-ed?
Because it was too corky.
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
"Sip happens."
"You can't sip with us."
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Why did Wonder Woman rescue the Wine?
Because that's what grape lady superheroes do!
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
"Love the wine you're with."
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
Why have a mer little when you can have a merlot?
"I need to re-wine my life."
You’re wine in a million.
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
"Be kind, re-wine."
What time do ladies drink wine?
At Wine O'Clock.
Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!
"No wine left behind."
"Adulting makes me wine."
Remember to stop and smell the rosé.
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
What kind of wine is aged to purr-fection?
Mos-cat-o!
Wine puns. They're always in pour taste.
"Here for the right riesling."
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
Which type of wine only comes in a box?
Carbordeaux.
Oh no! My wine glass is empty. Somebody call Wine-One-One!
"Great minds drink alike."
"Read between the wines."
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
"On cloud wine."
"You had me at merlot."
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
Why have less scato when you can have mo’ scato?
What kind of wine do traffic cops like best?
Fine wine!
"Alcohol you later."
"Rosé all day."
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
.
I’m not old. I’m aged to perfection. And full bodied.
"Wine a little, laugh a lot."
Whenever I feel like wining, I remind myself to put a cork in it.
"It isn't good to keep things bottled up."
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