How does cabernet like to travel abroad?
On a cruise sip.
Why have less scato when you can have mo’ scato?
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
Whenever I feel like wining, I remind myself to put a cork in it.
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
What does a cat lady say on Friday night?
I am drinking wine and feline fine!
"I need to re-wine my life."
What kind of wine is aged to purr-fection?
Mos-cat-o!
"Read between the wines."
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
Why was the white wine's off-beat pun so boo-ed?
Because it was too corky.
Do librarians like white wine?
No, they like theirs well red!
"Sip happens."
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
What time do ladies drink wine?
At Wine O'Clock.
"No wine left behind."
"You can't sip with us."
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
"Be kind, re-wine."
Don’t hang around booze hounds. They’re wine-y bitches.
"Rosé all day."
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
What kind of wine do they serve at the horse races?
Chardon-neigh!
What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
Remember to stop and smell the rosé.
What should you do with an old inventory of fine French wine?
Liquidate it to the highest bidder.
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
Like a pro wrestler in a headlock, I’m indulging in a little Sham pain.
"Everything happens for a riesling, right?"
"You had me at merlot."
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Why did Wonder Woman rescue the Wine?
Because that's what grape lady superheroes do!
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
You’re wine in a million.
"It isn't good to keep things bottled up."
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
"Wine a little, laugh a lot."
Did you hear about the little grape who didn’t want to be made into wine?
Unfortunately, he was pressed into service!
Why do we enjoy wine jokes?
Because they're de-vine!
"It's wine o'clock."
Why does your grandma like wine so much?
Because at her age, she needs glasses!
"Hakuna Moscato. It means drink wine."
"Great minds drink alike."
Why have a mer little when you can have a merlot?
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.