Made the mistake of offering my realtor some lipton iced tea
I forgot that he only drinks realty.
What drink do you need to steal? Virgin-tea. Why do hipsters only drink iced tea? Because ice was water before it was cool.
What's the hardest tea to swallow?
Reality.
Tea pun-packed poem for my mum's birthday card
It’s been oolong time since my mum was born,
About Six-tea years to date,
Chai as you might, you can’t possible list,
her cupious amazing traits
Her balanced demeanour
Her Kindness and (earl) grace,
rooibost sense of humour,
too many to name in this teany space,
to pekoe out just a few does not do her justice,
let’s not stir things up and cause more of a ruckus,
While this ode may be (chamo)miles away from a Maya Angelou,
It’s just an obnoxious way to say how very matcha I love you.
What do teachers drink at school? Facul-Tea.
What drink brings you down to earth? Gravi-Tea.
I used to randomly steal beverages off people...
I stopped when I realized it wasn't my cup of tea
What do people with ambition drink? Loft-Tea.
What do you call someone who chokes on their tea?
A cough-y drinker.
What goes in dry and comes out wet. The longer I'm in, the stronger I get.
What kind of tea do babies drink? Tit Tea.
What kind of celebration pays down the national debt? A tea party.
What kind of tea does Billy like?
Ability.
What am I? A tea bag you dirty minded human...
How long does it take to brew Chinese tea? Oolong time.
What can you only drink in the Middle East? Dust-Tea.
What did Katy Perry drink when she was little? Bust-Tea.
An Native American drank 100 cups of tea.
Next day they found him dead in his tea pee.
What's the opposite of Green Tea? Fat-Tea.
What do you drink with the Queen of England? Royal-Tea.
When shouldn't you drink a hot beverage? If it's not your cup of tea.
What did four of the last five presidents drink? Left-Tea.
I told my mom there was a crack in her mug...
She said, ”No, only tea.”
What do sophisticated fish drink? Salt-Tea.
What do athletes drink before games? Sport-Tea.
Why do Communists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.
Why don't anarchists drink green tea?
Because it helps fight free radicals.
Did you hear about the man who stole thousands of dollars worth of rare tea?
He went to prison for Oolong time.
What's the only tea an Englishman can't stand?
Humidity.
What is a ghost pirate’s favorite kind of tea?
Boo tea!
What do teapots wear to a tea party? A T-shirt.
What do you drink before you audition for "The Voice" ? Tea-Lo Green
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag
A tea bag stays longer in the cup.
Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his tea before it was cool.
What do you drink if you want to freshen your breath? Mint-Tea.
How does a vampire make tea? With a used tampon.
A pickle store is giving out their new tea-flavored pickles on the street today
I tried some and I guess they tasted quite a-tea-pickle.
What did the girl dinosaur ask her pet dog?
"Do you want some tea, Rex?"
What do you call a healthy dinosaur? Tea-Rex.
What do dogs like to drink? Kit-Tea.
Why does Britain like tea so much?
Because tea leaves.
What drink breaks the ice? Flirt-Tea. How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
What drink do goalies hate? Penal-tea.
I seem to have run out of tea...
What a catastrotea.
Drinking tea while being too calm can kill you, did you know?
It's called a casual tea.
What does a worry wart drink? Safe-Tea.
What‘s an Italian’s favorite tea?
Spagettea!
What's a nervous person's favorite drink?
Insecuri tea!
How does the Skywalker family like their tea?
Lukewarm.
What do politicans need to drink? Honest-Tea.