Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
He told her she was being too kneady.
Young Billy had to mail a loaf of bread at the toast office today.
What did the toast say to the psychic?
You bread my mind!
What did the mother bread tell her baby roll? You really are the apple of my rye.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
Everyone needs to eat bread because loaf is what makes the world go round. Loaf truly is.
What does bread say to a friend after doing them a favor?
It’s the yeast I could do.
You know why I love bread puns? Because they never go stale.
Wholey-grain! You really bread my mind!
"Are you sure about this?"
"Crust me, I'm on a roll."
How did the baker cut four loaves of bread at the same time? By buying a four-loaf-cleaver.
Why were the kids throwing flour and bread at their school? They wanted to rise to the occasion.
Why are bread puns the greatest? They never grow mold.
How do you make dog bread? You use collie flour.
It’s too bad that bread puns are always so crumby. Mmm . . . crumbs.
Do you know what you call it when you place beef between two slices of bread? You get a bull-only sandwich.
The young lady had to throw her toaster in the trash. She was diagnosed as black-toast intolerant.
"Scone be a lot of fun. Wheat love for you to join us."
What did one bread lover say to the other?
Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
How does bread win over friends?
“You can crust me.”
Did you hear about the bread party? It’s scone be a lot of fun, and wheat love for you to join us.
What did one bread say to another after a long day? Don’t worry because tomorrow will be butter.
Do you know how to get a raise at the bread factory? Try buttering up to the boss.
When I tried taking a picture of my bread load, it came out grainy. I think that that is a common problem.
The bag of flour was so confused.He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeast-erday.
It’s too bad the man couldn’t quit his job at the bakery. He really kneaded the dough.
They fired the loaf of bread from her job. They say that she kept breaking down and would rye on the job.
Ciabatta stay away from me because I don’t want naan of that. That’s one way to tell someone to keep away.
A new bakery in town began ding extremely well. They said that business was definitely on the rise.
What’s the worst thing about a bread pun?
It tends to get stale.
That wide loaf has a decent bread-th. Nice.
The bread baker won the girl over because he kept giving her a flour. How sweet!
Why was the baker in a serious panic? He thought that he was in a loaf or death situation.
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
Did you hear what happened with the sourdough bread? It really rose to the occasion today.
The baker just felt this incredible knead to make bread. That’s certainly the truth.
You knead me in your loaf.
Did you hear about the man who quit his job at a bakery? They said that it left him loathe of bread.
What did the banker want from the baker?
To pump her nickels.
Did you hear the little loaves playing hide-and-seek earlier? They kept yelling, “Bready or not, here I come!”
In the 1970s, hippies loved going to a Grateful Dead concert and getting toasted. That’s certainly the truth.
I’m a wrapper, so I get a lot of dough. A bread wrapper, that is.
What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek?
Bready or not, here I crumb!
A young slice of bread came up to his crush. He told her that he was really falling in loaf with her.
hat’s the most sophisticated kind of bread?
The upper crust.
Why did the aging bread roll retire?
Her career was already toast.
You better watch out before you play a game with any bread? Baguette ready to lose.
What was the main job of the bread truck? To haul buns.