What’s a good way to start a conversation with a cheese plate on Tinder?
“Hello. Is it brie you’re looking for?”
Q: Why did the orange cross the road?
A: Because everyone thought he was a chicken.
Which word can be used to describe a peach that is surprised, shocked, or angry with strong emotion? – Speachless!
I tried telling a joke while drinking my juice for breakfast, but nobody got my punch line.
It's Taco Night, so on my way home, I grabbed a bag of shredded cheese at the store, queso we needed some more.
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Why didn't the drunk Mexican druglord find the Bacon Tree? Because he walked into a Ham Bush!
Which tool does a peach biologist often use for its experiment? – A peachtree dish (Petri dish).
Why do Communists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
Some people have to stop telling meat puns, because they simply butcher every single joke.
How did the hotdog overcome his fear of ketchup? He mustered up the courage.
What do you call Chewbacca with chocolate stuck in its fur?
chocolate chip wookiee.
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
What did the nectarine say after the church service? The peacher gave a great sermon!
What do fruit bowls say when they dress up as a ghost on Halloween? Be cherry afraid!
I wasn’t sure if I ordered enough tacos from Taco Bell.
So I got a just in quesadilla.
A crayon that looks like a strawberry is usually called a cranberry.
What did the cherry say when it was given a bunch of flowers? You are cherry sweet.
I dropped a bottle of ketchup on my foot.
It caused immense pain to ma toes.
what does a female corn do when she likes a male corn?
she corn-fesses.
Q: Why were the two green pea plants so close?
A: They had deep roots.
When I got mugged on my way back from the greengrocers, I was peach-less!
I squeezed the innards of a pumpkin into a glass, and the result was just beautiful
In fact, it was gourdjuice.
What’s an orange’s favourite animal? An orange-utan.
How does a robot eat it’s guacamole?
Microchips.
Some people prefer milk after it has churned. I guess they find it butter that way.
What can you make with 6.02 x 10^23 avocados?
Guaca-mole.
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous aka cashews.
Did you know you can make a really good music player out of a cherry cake? It’s called a gateau blaster.
What is the difference between a pineapple and a school bus? The little pricks are on the inside of the bus, but on the outside of the pineapple.
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What's worst than a monkey eating bananas? A monkey going bananas.
Which search engine is popular amongst mice? Ask Cheese.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
Was your guacamole salad good?
Yes, it was avocado this world.
The only type of cookies a cookie monster loves to eat during Halloween is Ghoul Scout Cookies.
Knock Knock.
Who’s there? Donut. Donut who? Donut ask, it’s a secret!
Nowadays oranges have decided to go out with prune. The reason is that it is becoming so hard to find a date.
What kind of keys do kids like to carry? Cookies!
When I refused to have the soup, my sister said "People who do not have soup are stew-pid".
Do not be sad because of these bad words. You are always a fineapple in my heart.
Two peanuts were walking down the road but only one was attacked. They suspect the reason was the other was unsalted.
What did the Mama Hot Dog say to the little frankfurter? Ketch-up!
The cold broth is known to have lived in Stock-holm.
Do you know what the common thing between a pineapple and a king is? Both of them wear a crown proudly on their top.
Did you hear what happened between the cook and the onion?
I think there was a fight. It got a little dicey and tears were shed.
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
What's a pickle's life philosophy?
Never a dill moment.
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