How do you spot a radical baker?
They’re always going against the grain.
What do you call an onion that carries electromagnetic waves? A photonion.
One day, my stepfather ordered some fish tacos. I asked him what kind of fish goes in a fish taco.
He said, "Dead."
I was gonna make a joke about Mediterranean food...
But hummus have missed the mark, and now I falafel.
What did the expired milk say after being picked up way past its due date? It was well beyond their wildest creams.
The two slices of bread decided to leave the bakery. I heard that they wanted to grow mold together.
Someone told me I looked like a salt shaker. I took it as a condiment.
When Berry the dog dug up the woman's strawberry patch, she angrily exclaimed "That is the final straw, Berry."
Lots of peas work as spies. Espea-onage is very common.
What did Gorgonzola say to Cheddar? Lookin' Sharp.
What did the M&M go to college? Because he wanted to be a Smarty.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What did the two onions who were lovers say to each other before being separated? "Our love will forever go-nion on!"
What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? Milk and Quackers!
What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa? Must be a hottermmelon.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
Why is pumpkin pie so much better than sweet potato pie?
Sweet potatoes are ungourdly.
What do teachers drink at school? Facul-Tea.
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
Do you know what is so special about the alphabet soup of Twitter? It only allows 140 letters.
When you come across a strawberry that uses foul language, it must be berry rude.
What's the difference between black eyed peas and chickpeas?
Black eyed peas can sing a tune, chickpeas can only hummus one.
My pet cow thinks she produces almond milk. She must be nuts.
Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he ate his soup before it was cool.
What do you call it when a taco stands in your way ?
An obs-taco
What kind of beer can you make from a potato?
Spud Light.
Son: Hey dad, I stole a peach from the grocery store today.
Dad: Why?
Son: I don’t know, but I feel guilty. It’s a real pit in my stomach.
What's a barista's favorite morning mantra? Rise and grind.
What is the recipe for Honeymoon Salad? Lettuce alone without dressing.
Why did the banana go out with a prune?
Because he couldn't find a date.
When you cross an orange and a bunny, you will end up with a pip squeak.
What do fruits do when they are really really afraid? They run away as fast as their legs can cherry them.
"Love the wine you're with."
What do you call a chicken staring at a salad?
Chicken sees a salad.
I must confess that I've started stealing vegetables from the local grocery...
I can't help it! I get to the store and I have to take a leek!
Why are they called tacos?
They don’t say much.
Why was the orange the valedictorian of her class?
She was the zest in class.
What is the perfect name for a sad strawberry? It is called a blueberry.
If you are wondering about the fuzziest character in the gaming world, well it is definitely Princess Peach.
Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?
“Lack of concentration.”
Did you see the movie about the hot dog? It was an Oscar Wiener.
When the little boy was baking a cake why did it run away? Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it!
I came across a man who was eating strawberries at the bank. He told me he wanted to eat rich food.
Went to the doctor because I got a strawberry stuck in my ear
He gave me some cream for it
Strawberries are only made in the strawberry plant.
What do you call the Commander of a vegetable army?
A kernel.
What does a surprised pumpkin say?
OH MY GOURD!
What do you call a dog with a fever? A hot dog.
What did the nut say to his girlfriend at the pine-ic? “I am nuts about you, cashew see!”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
Go to BabaMail
