Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.
What did the pastry chef say when a banana cream pie he made completely satisfies a tyrannical ruler?
It hit despot.
What do two cherries say when they get married? I promise to cherry-ish you forever.
How will the other onions remember the onion that died? It will be forever minced!
A strawberry's favorite celebrity is Mary Berry.
Went to the doctor because I got a strawberry stuck in my ear
He gave me some cream for it
What’s sweet and goes woof?
Pupcakes!
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
How do monkeys get down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-ster.
I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk I'd sniff you first.
How do hot dogs greet each other? They say “give me some skin!”
Did you hear about the crime family that took over the wine importing business?
They call themselves the Sip-ranos!
What did the fans say to the band named after a famous chickpea spread?
Hummus a tune.
Why was the salad late to the dinner party?
He was waiting for his wife to get dressing.
Q: Why did no one like peach’s personality?
A: Because it had a heart of stone.
What's the hardest tea to swallow?
Reality.
Egg-Plant a kiss on me.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
What goes in dry and comes out wet. The longer I'm in, the stronger I get.
Why did the orange cry?
Someone hurt its peelings.
I love you a tot!
I lost my grip, and my beer shattered on the floor.
This Corona outbreak is really getting out of hand.
A scarecrow's favorite fruit to eat is straw-berry.
I think I drank some expired milk. I just have a gut feeling.
Why did the lemon fail its driving test?
Because it kept peeling out
Have you heard the new song from the band that entirely consists of vegetables?
It’s a master peas.
A man went to his psychiatrist and complained that every time he drink coffee, he would get a stabbing pain in his right eye.
The psychiatrist said, “Well, have you tried taking the spoon out?”
What do you call an apple that's been around the world? Johnny Appleseed.
What's slimy cold long and smells like pork? Kermit the frogs finger!
Do you know what the favourite soup of a ghost is? It is the Scream of Broccoli.
What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce?
Chicken sees a salad.
Why are lemons safer than limes?
There’s no such thing as lemon’s disease.
Why don't bananas snore? Because they don't want to wake up the rest of the bunch.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
Why shouldn't you be too inquisitive with a cherry? Ask no questions tell no pies.
There’s this corn on the cob stand that I really like, but it started making ads
They were really corny.
What hotel do cheese lover’s stay in?
The Stilton.
Fish taco says why don't you want to taco about it And the nacho says cause I'm nacho friend.
Where do you smart hot dogs go?… On the honor role.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
What do you do when a pickle wants to play cards?
Dill'em in.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
What's the difference between black eyed peas and chickpeas?
Black eyed peas can sing a tune, chickpeas can only hummus one.
Sometimes, all you need is to shake a few trees to find the perfect peach for you.
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
I like fried chickpeas, but I shouldn't eat them. Every time I do I falafel.
What do you call a frozen frankfurter? A Chili dog.
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