Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
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