Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...
Once upon a time there was this lobster...
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
I met this really beautiful crustacean, but I lobst her number.
What do you call a lobster with a Christmas hat?
Santa Claws
What do you call a lobster that's afraid of tight spaces?
Claw-strophobic
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
Have you seen my lobster?
I'm worried he might by a lost claws.
How does a lobster answer the phone?
"Shello?"
What’s the difference between a greyhound station and a lobster with a boob job?
One’s a crusty bus-station, the other’s a busty crustacean.
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
What do you get if you cross a lobster with a telephone?
A snappy talk.
What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?
Ones a crustaecian and the other is a crushed Asian.
My lobster's name is:
Claude
here do lobsters go to borrow money? The prawn broker.
The lobster is one shell of an animal.
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea-weed.
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