Why don’t oranges go around blind?
“Because they take Vitamin See!”
What drink do goalies hate? Penal-tea.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
My mother says: “Leave that peach cobbler alone on the table!” However, I cannot help myself and sneak in to watch it making beautiful peach shoes.
Why did the orange’s musical number receive a bad review?
Because it wasn’t an “orange-inal.”
Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!
What do you call it when you walk into a coffee shop and feel like you've been there before? Déja-brew.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock? Because it was marble cake!
On Valentine's Day, the peach said to his wife, "You will always have a peach of my heart!"
Where should you call if you find a bad cheese shop?
The feta business bureau.
Bananas, for breakfast, are such an a-peeling choice.
Swallowing a cherry stone is not the end of the world. It’s just one of life’s little pitfalls.
What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A plumpkin!
What do cannibals eat for dessert? Chocolate covered aunts.
Why does a little cherry always look up to its parents? It tries to follow in their fruitsteps.
The price of candy at the movie theater is quite ridiculous. They're always raisinet!
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
Why is corn popular around Halloween?
Because it’s so earie.
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
The peach couple from school is totally in love. They seem so perfect for peach other.
Why did the man put the cake in the freezer? Because his wife told him to ice it!
What is the angriest nut?
Pissed-aschios
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
What did the baby corn call his dad?
Pop corn!
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream?
It was icing on the cake.
I recently heard on the news that due to newly detected fungus infection in the onions, the government was recalling all the recent packages of the vegetables. Despite being a farmer, I had no tears to shed over this.
when I smelled breakfast in the morning it was bacon me eggcited.
What do you call a nut who loves the game of chess?
A chess-nut.
I just hear that the woman who lives next door and loves fruit died. I hope she would rest in peach.
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
What rhymes with orange?
No, it doesn’t.
Chefs earn a meager celery, cumin home beat they just want to read the pepper and spend thyme with the kids.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
I've got a really good vegetable pun.
I’d tell you but I’m worried you’d think it’s too corny.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
National Herbs and Spices Day is celebrated annually on June 10.
After his meal, the cannibal wipes his mouth and says: “My wife cooks the greatest soup in the world. But I will miss her so much.”
What do you calla watermelon that just won’t stop committing crimes? A watefelon.
What do you do when you try to bake a cherry pie for the first time and it doesn't turn out so well? Just wait for the second bite of the cherry.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
How did the roommate who stole the last avocado from the fruit bowl justify her thievery?
“I know it’s wrong, but it feels so ripe!”
What do athletes drink before games? Sport-Tea.
What did the Catholic Nectarine Priest say to the church? Peach be with you. It was a normal thing to hear from the pul-pit.
The fruit politician is losing its support in the country because of hate peach.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
What is the greeting that Korean onions tell each other when they meet in the streets? They say 'Onion-Haseyo'.
What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
“You don’t pepper-own me.”
…and what did the delivery guy say in reply?
“Hey now, don’t get saucy.”
Go to BabaMail
