Lots of peas work as spies. Espea-onage is very common.
A cup of coffee is the ideal start to a brew-tiful morning!
What did the fruit bowl say when it saw Santa Claus come down the chimney? We wish you a cherry Christmas!
What is the difference between a pineapple and a school bus? The little pricks are on the inside of the bus, but on the outside of the pineapple.
Here’s another one; what about an otter who lives in an emptied out melon? An ottermelon.
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
Once I got peas stuck in my ear. I had to make people re-pea-t themselves.
What did the street cheese say after he got attacked by several blades? I've felt grater.
A packing plant received a load of lettuce to process. The workers grabbed the boxes quickly from the top and the bottoms fell out spilling the produce.
The boss yells, grab the boxes by the bottom, or heads are going to roll!
What happened to the criminal magician who ate to much salt?
Cardiac arrest.
Mum, you are my soup-er star.
When does a hot dog have a close shave? At the barber-cue!
The peach was late for work because it had to make some pit stops on the way.
What do you call a cow that doesn’t produce any milk? A milk dud!
What do you get when you drink milk
A moostache
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
What do you call fake oranges?
“Pulp Fiction”
Where should you call if you find a bad cheese shop?
The feta business bureau.
I've just invented a new Canadian beer
It's a form of I.P.Eh
What’s the opposite of coffee?
Sneezy.
What did Bacon say to Tomato? Lettuce get together!
What do you call a beautiful pumpkin?
Gourdgeous.
What do you get when you cross a human and a pear?
A pear-son.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
What is the similarity between my wallet and an onion? Whenever I open both of them, I cry.
Did you hear about the guy who overdosed on curry powder? He went into a korma.
HELP! It's a taco emergency!
Dial 9 Juan Juan!
I asked my nectarine friend how she was doing after her break up and she said 'It's the pits, man.'
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
Vampires love cookies too, they love No-stake cookies.
The cookie monster couldn’t make his bed, why? Because he couldn’t find his cookie sheets.
My dog is sad after eating her favorite fruit and getting wet from the juice.
She's a watered melancholy watermelon collie.
What kind of keys do kids like to carry? Cookies!
Did you know there’s an app for corn growers?
It’s made in Sili-corn Valley!
What did the mama nut say to her son?
“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”
A strawberry screamed at the other, "Were it not that ripe, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam."
What is the best way to stop a pizza curling?
Hide its brush.
What currency do fruit use to make purchases?
Banana bread!
Let's pumpkin spice things up a bit
What did the duck eat for lunch? Soup and Quackers.
My doctor tells me I've got a bacon addiction.
Thankfully he thinks I can be cured.
What happened when rockers couldn't get their favorite dessert? Rage against the Broken Ice Cream Machine.
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? A Candy Baa. Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty? They had a baby, Ruth.
What drink breaks the ice? Flirt-Tea. How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
What do fruit bowls say when they dress up as a ghost on Halloween? Be cherry afraid!
I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk I'd sniff you first.
How can we tell the difference between a can of beef soup and a can of pork soup? Just read the labels.
What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
“You don’t pepper-own me.”
…and what did the delivery guy say in reply?
“Hey now, don’t get saucy.”
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort.
Go to BabaMail
