Beer doesn't make you fat
It makes you lean.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!
What was the main job of the bread truck? To haul buns.
What do you call bananas who are friends with monkeys? A bunch of idiots.
I always tend to forget the french word for strawberry sometimes. But, then I eventually remember the fraise.
How does a hen leave its house?
Through the eggs-it.
What does a hippy cherry wear to a festival? A pie dye T-shirt.
The strawberry went out with the grape only because he couldn't find a date.
Why was the peach so sad at the funeral? It left a deep pit in its heart.
How do monsters like their eggs?
Terri-fried.
Whenever the peach father gets mad at his son, he just screams loudly: “You are the son of a peach!”
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
What are ice cream cones like as parents?
They’re big softies.
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
What is a DJs favorite vegetable?
A turnip.
What did the pickle say when he was told he was going in to a salad?
I relish the thought.
The young woman decided to become a professional baker. She realized that it could help her earn her bread and butter.
Did you hear the one about the watermelon pirate who went to the Caribbean? Must have desperately wanted to catch some arrgh and arrgh.
My father gave me a peach. I told him that I wanted a pear. So he gave me another peach.
I went into the library and asked for pint of milk. The librarian said 'this is a library'. So i whispered 'I'd like a pint of milk please'.
What is the difference between pea soup and roast beef? Everyone would roast beef.
In the middle of the night yesterday, I dreamt that I was swimming in a sea of oranges only to wake up and realize that it was just a Fanta-sea.
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
Angel food cake, of course!
There’s muffin I wouldn’t do for breakfast.
Why couldn’t the orange dance in the talent show without his partner?
Because it takes two to “tang-o.”
What cut of meat do you get from an extremely tired butcher?
A filet mid-yawn
What happened to the football team that practiced in a corn field?
They got creamed!
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What do you call an ant dipped in chocolate? Decad-ant.
Did you hear about the pick-up artist who only ever wears green leaves on his head? Yeah, he’s definitely a pineapple smoothie.
What makes nuts healthy? They have many nut-rients.
Why was the orange feeling sad?
It lost its zest for life.
Why do farmers make terrible comedians?
Their jokes are corny!
Egg puns are the most egg-citing.
What is a monkey’s favourite cookie?
Chocolate Chimp!
Q: What kind of desserts does a turkey like?
A: Peach gobbler.
Q: Why couldn’t the orange believe that her friend had let her down?
A: This was because citrus-ted him!
Did you hear about the corn stalk that changed careers?
He went into a different field!
On which website will you learn about the hidden gossips and secrets of the onion world? On the website Wiki-Leeks.
And what's its favorite Bob Marley song? Don't Worry, Be Frappé.
What do you call an onion that is very valuable to jewelers? You call it a pearl onion.
How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.
I caught the chef sticking his hand in the cooking pot. He looked at me and said...
"I was just feeling a little chili."
Why was the orange skeptical of everyone around him?
He was planted with a seed of doubt.
My wife started a tropical diet
There’s so much stuff in the house it’s enough to make a mango crazy.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
What do squirrels watch on TV?
Nut-flix.
Q: Who is Peach’s favorite actor?
A: Brad Pit.
You are the best, I feel so peachy when I am with you!
Go to BabaMail
