The tiny bag of flour got in trouble, so his mother sent him to bread early. He kneaded to be punished.
Strawberries have berry good eyesight because they are packed with a lot of Vitamin See.
Did you hear about the sign on the bakery that got everyone talking? It said “I knead dough to live.”
What's green and swims in the sea?
Moby Pickle.
One of the most courageous souls in the world is anybody who looks at a pineapple and thinks that “I bet I would eat it.”
Donut even think about taking another donut!
Everyone makes fun of him for using old coffee, but he insists it has the greatest sedimental value.
The United Nations gave its members a basket of peaches on 21 September - the International Peach Day.
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
What do you call it when 13 preschoolers have just had their juice?
A Daycare's Buzzin'.
Apparently there's a fruit that is naturally radioactive.
I think that's bananas!
A farmer complained that he didn't have enough fruit to make a living.
I told him he needs to grow a pear.
What do you call really scared pasta?
Chicken noodles.
What soup killed Rob Stark? Italian Wedding Massacre.
Why did the lemon like the orange? He’s not from concentrate.
When would an apple be not an apple? When it is a pineapple!
I almost got a world record for having the most peas up my nose but sadly I blew it.
What do you call yogurt that is terrified of other dairy products? A cow-ard!
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping onions which made me cry
Onions was a good dog
I can’t help but laugh a little when I see a pun about chocolate bars… snickers
If you put ice cream on the nutty brownie, you’re serving it ala-mond.
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag
A tea bag stays longer in the cup.
I tried buying a car from a religious person and got a lemon!
I suppose you get what you prayed for..
Did I invite you to the Barbecue?
Then why are you all up in my grill?
I've just been to court accused of sniffing the skins of vegetables and fruits.
I got off on a peel.
Q: Why did the pea sell his car?
A: The back seat didn’t have enough legume.
Why did the cherry go to the good drinks factory? It was cordially invited.
What does a surprised pumpkin say?
OH MY GOURD!
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his dessert?
Cause he was stuffed.
What can a whole apple do that half an apple can't do? It can look round.
What is an astronauts favorite chocolate? A marsbar!
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
What do strawberries wear to bed?
Jammies!
Accidentally I spilt some tomato ketchup in my eye.
In Heinze sight, it was my mistake.
Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
I went to watch a play and there were so many peach errors in the dialogues.
What day to eggs hate the most?
Fry-day.
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
What do two cherries say when they get married? I promise to cherry-ish you forever.
My son ate daffodil bulbs instead of onions
But that's really serious! Is he in hospital?
Yes, he's still a bit yellow, but he should be coming out in the spring.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
The unripe strawberry wasn't added to the starting lineup of the game because he was too green.
I've been hitting the bottle pretty hard recently.
Still can't get the last of that ketchup out.
What do athletes drink before games? Sport-Tea.
I went to my fridge to get some lettuce for my salad
But there was none Romaine-ing.
Why did the cherry blossom tree seem scared when it was trying to make a cherry pie? Because it was baking like a leaf.
What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm !
Did you hear that the Lemon and the Orange divorced?
The Lemon was very bitter.
What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods.
A hill-dilly.
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