You are the best, I feel so peachy when I am with you!
Strawberries love delicious food. Their favorite is Jam-balaya.
Why couldnt the pumpkin have kids?
He had a halloweener.
What do you call fraudulent milk? Cow-nterfeit.
Milk aliens have landed. They said 'take me to your litre'.
What did the artichoke say to the man eating a salad? Have a heart.
How can you tell the difference between a monster and a banana? Try picking it up. If you can't, it's either a monster or a giant banana.
How is divorce like espresso? It's bitter and expensive.
Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a telanovella?
“It was melondramatic.”
What do you call cheese that is sad? Blue cheese.
I recently read a book by an onion which had opened up on its life. Midway through the book, I started crying.
Why is cherry pie so legendary? Because it is history in the baking.
Why did the teapot get in trouble? Because he was Naught-Tea.
What does a cherry say when it delivers bad news? Don't fruit the messenger.The Peach President lost the presidential race because he got im-peached.
What do you call an onion that carries electromagnetic waves? A photonion.
What kind of tea do babies drink? Tit Tea.
We are thinking of spending the night at the peach house, by the shore.
What is the onion that laughs a lot and is small and white in color? It is a tickled onion.
There was an announcement on the news the other day, we've finally achieved world peas.
Things don’t always pine out the way we want them to, but we can-nut give up!
What did the watermelon wife say to his stinky husband? You’ve got a strange smelon you today.
When is a birthday cake like a golf ball?
When it’s been sliced.
I steal my eggs from my next door neighbor.
I prefer them poached.
Why are you eating a banana with the skin on? Oh, it's all right. I know what's inside.
Today, I am eating a bun filled with pineapple and ham for my dinner. That is Hawaii roll.
What do you call a pastor who wanders from town to town, looking for leafy green vegetables?
A romaine Catholic priest.
When the egg saw the pan, it was terri-fried.
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What did the glass of wine say to the beer?
Nothing... They barley knew each other.
Why do watermelons take such a long time to make decisions?
“They’re always melon it over.”
Why are hot dogs angry? Because they are always getting roasted.
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that mango.
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
I rarely put orange slices in my beer.
Once in a Blue Moon.
My mum makes the best soups. She is a real soup-erstar.
What type of a computer does a horse like to eat? A Macintosh
How did I make the mango tree fit in my flower-pot?
I planted it.
Why didn’t the pineapple fit in with the other fruit? Because it’s rough around the edges.
An inspirational speaker came to speak at the fruit stand today. He told us to peach for the stars.
Why isn’t there an organization like Chocoholics Anonymous?
Because nobody wants to quit.
Why do comedians often start their act with peanut butter jokes? They love to warm up the crown by spreading the laughter.
What would a peach say to its girlfriend or boyfriend? – “You will always have a peach of my heart, baby!”
Why did black chocolate cry over his wine glass?
Because it was his bitter half.
My wife said that onions are the only vegetable that makes her cry
So I threw a pumpkin at her
Have you heard the one about the lemon cat?
It was a real sour puss.
What do people with ambition drink? Loft-Tea.
What does a meditating egg say?
Ohmmmmmmmlet.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? Because it lost its filling.
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