What do you call corn with red, white and blue kernels?
Americorn.
Why do girls scouts sell cookies? They wanna make a sweet first impression.
What did an angry donut say to his wife?
Donut talk to me.
Things don’t always pine out the way we want them to, but we can-nut give up!
Q: How do you call a magic berry?
A: Cherry Potter.
I went to Taco Bell and order nacho fries
the person behind the counter wouldn't give them to me, just kept saying "nacho fries".
During World War 2, sending food to the troops was a challenge. Researchers had to concentrate to figure out how to send orange juice.
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
How do playful monkeys go down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-ster!
Keep calm and carrot on.
Me: "Alexa check my bank balance and tell me which apple product can I buy?"
Alexa- "Apple juice."
What is a butcher’s favorite Elvis Presley song? Love Meat Tenders.
My friend wanted me to take care of his extremely fragile pumpkin.
I told him I'd gourd it with my life.
All the contestants at the pig Olympics were very happy with their prizes. They each won pork medallions.
Mom: *Struggling to make a decision between 1% or 2%.
Dad: Milk up your mind!
I allow myself only one donut per year.
This morning I had 433 B.C., 1731, and 1952.
Hap-pea-ness is when you and your friend are like two peas in a pod.
Why did the orange help the old lady cross the road?
To do a random act of rindness.
What did the pepperoni say to the cook?
You wanna pizza me?
What drink scares defense lawyers? Guilt-Tea.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a chicken? The best bacon-and-eggs of your life.
I saw a fruit running from the police recently
It was a water felon.
In my friend's house, I saw an onion ring. So, I picked it up and answered it.
Why do communist hate bacon?
Because it’s from capitalist pigs.
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
When the peach pit farewell to his friend, he said, "See you later, peach out".
What happens when you go on an all-cheese diet?
You cheddar few pounds.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
Even though Jake was a heartthrob Casanova, he just had to break up with his long-time watermelon vending girlfriend; said she was always melondramatic about everything.
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
Remind your kids not to overdo it on the pumpkin pie this time of year.
Or they might get autumn'y ache.
Don't be a jerk-o-lantern
Why did the coffee call the police? Because it was mugged.
Why did the citrus fruit join the military?
“Because it was a navel orange.”
This is a taco and burrito conversation.
Nachos.
"You are so bottlefull to me."
At a restaurant, the peach said, "Hey, I would like a peach of cake for dessert, thank you!"
Why is the chef so mean?
He beats the eggs.
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
How do you kill a salad? You go for the carrot-id artery.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
A young slice of bread came up to his crush. He told her that he was really falling in loaf with her.
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
Ever heard of French Donuts?
They’re the Beigne of my existence.
Why did the birthday cake go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling crumby!
You should never give milk to someone who is open minded and hasn't yet had breakfast. They're lack-toast and tolerant.
What do you call 2000 pounds of Chinese soup? Won Ton.
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a watermelon by it’s diameter? Watermelon PI.
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
The veggie lover was a total stalk-er.
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