What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
What type of window do donuts prefer in their homes?
Double glazed.
How can you spot a fashionista donut?
They’re into all the latest glazes.
Why couldn’t the donut reach enlightenment? Because it was already holy.
When do bakers stop making donuts?
When they get tired of the hole thing.
What do you call a Boston creme donut that’s a straight-A student?
The creme of the crop.
What do donuts think about donut puns? They donut like them!
I allow myself only one donut per year.
This morning I had 433 B.C., 1731, and 1952.
Knock knock!
Who’s there? Doughnut. Doughnut Who? Doughnut forget to close the door!
What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts!
Why did the donut go to the dentist? It needed a filling!"
What did Yoda say when he turned a patron away for ordering a pie?
“Dough. Or doughnut. There is no pie.”
Why did the baker quit making donuts?
Because he was fed up with the hole business!
Ever heard of French Donuts?
They’re the Beigne of my existence.
What kind of donuts can fly?
The plain ones.
What did the pastry chef say to his unsupportive father?
“Donut hole me back.”
What is the only thing that can cure a sick do-nut?
An antidought!
Why did the croissants take the donuts and bagels to Disneyland?
They thought it would be fun for the hole family.
What’s a donut’s favorite lullaby?
“Sprinkle, Sprinkle Little Star.”
What was the donut’s least favorite part of its day?
I’m not really sure; it glazed over that part.
Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his donut?
He was stuffed!
What happened to the renegade donuts?
They went down in a glaze of glory.
What do you call it when you order the same donut every day?
A do-rut!
Q: What’s a donut’s favorite drink?
A: Hole-y water!
Where’s a donut’s favorite vacation spot?
The Sahara dessert!
Knock, knock
Who’s there? CIA CIA, who? CI ate your last doughnut!
What do you call a pastry that is a priest?
A Holy Donut!
What is a donut’s favorite day of the week?
Fry-day.
Why did the donut go to the doctor?
He was feeling crumby.
Why do donuts hate puns so much?
They donut like to joke around!
Why do donuts make terrible teachers?
They’re always glazing over the important stuff.
What do donuts wear to weddings? Tuxe-doughs!
I’m opening a grocery store that specializes in Swiss cheese and donuts.
I’m calling it Hole Foods.
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
What did an angry donut say to his wife?
Donut talk to me.
Why do golfers love donuts?
Always a hole-in-one!
How busy was the donuts day? It was jam packed!
Why did the donut go to a therapist?
He felt empty inside.
Knock Knock
Who’s there Justin Justin who? Justin time to make the donuts!
What kind of donuts fly? Plain ones!
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.
What do you call a cute donut?
A-dough-able.
What are strange donuts made out of?
Weird-doughs.
Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
How does Bob Marley like his donuts?
Wi’ jam in.
Did you hear the joke about the donut? Probably not, it was crummy!
What’s the healthiest part of a donut?
The middle.
Knock Knock.
Who’s there? Donut. Donut who? Donut ask, it’s a secret!
The arrogant baker declared, “You’ll never hear a complaint about my doughnuts outside this shop window.”
The customer agreed, “It must be the double glazing.”
What kind of evidence can a donut not take to trial?
Anecdoughtal evidence.
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