What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
What wisdom did the daddy cheese pass down to his son?
A curd in the hand is worth two in the bush.
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
What do you call referential cheese?
Feta.
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
Why do cheeses make bad musicians?
They’re always sharp.
Why didn’t the chef slice his cheese?
He had grater plans.
What Welsh cheese must you always eat with caution? Caerphilly
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
Which is the most religious cheese? Swiss, because it is holy.
Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.
What do you call an oriental cheese? Parm-asian
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
Why did the wheel act so bossy? Cause he was the "Big Cheese."
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
Which search engine is popular amongst mice? Ask Cheese.
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
What happens when you go on an all-cheese diet?
You cheddar few pounds.
What's the most popular American cheese sitcom? Curd Your Enthusiasm
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
What did the cheese say after escaping the mouse? I'm Brieeee!
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
Did you hear what happened to the cheese after its breakup?
It got provolonely.
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
What do you call cheese that is sad? Blue cheese.
What drives cheese crazy?
That everyone around them is crackers.
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie.
What was the cheese’s strategy when it ran for president?
Make America grate again.
Why does cheese look normal? Because everyone else on the plate is crackers.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho Cheese!
Why should you always bring a bag of tortilla chips to a party?
In queso emergency.
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
What do you call a socialite made of cheese?
Paris Stilton.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite Village People song?
Nacho Man.
How does the Cheese Detective choose his clients?
On a queso by queso basis.
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
What do you feed the son of god? Cheeses of Nazareth.
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort
What did the cheese say to the other cheese? I smell something swiss-picious!
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
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