What kind of wine is aged to purr-fection?
Mos-cat-o!
"Giving you more reasons to wine."
"Alcohol you later."
"Sip happens."
"Is that a yay or cabernet?"
"Everything happens for a riesling, right?"
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
"On cloud wine."
"My day just went from super to sip-erb, real quick."
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
"Adulting makes me wine."
"Will you accept this rosé?"
Why do we enjoy wine jokes?
Because they're de-vine!
How can you tell a wine taster is a newbie?
By the blanc look on her face.
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
Why did Mrs. Wine Grape run away from home?
She was tired of raisin a family.
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
"No wine left behind."
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
"Time to wine down."
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
Wino Woe: Forgive me, for I have zinned!
Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
You’re wine in a million.
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
Like a pro wrestler in a headlock, I’m indulging in a little Sham pain.
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
Vine Thought of the Day: Choosy moms choose wine!
"It's wine o'clock."
"Great minds drink alike."
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
"Back that glass up."
"You are so bottlefull to me."
What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
What does a cat lady say on Friday night?
I am drinking wine and feline fine!
Why do we love wine puns?
Because they're grape!
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
"You can't sip with us."
What should you do with an old inventory of fine French wine?
Liquidate it to the highest bidder.
Oh no! My wine glass is empty. Somebody call Wine-One-One!
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