What did the nectarine say after the church service? The peacher gave a great sermon!
Mom: Why did you shave the peaches!
Dad: The recipe asked for nectarines.
On Valentine's Day, the peach said to his wife, "You will always have a peach of my heart!"
Do you know why does your mother often shave a peach when cooking? Because she only needs nectarines for the recipe.
Back in the early 2010s, the peach children loved to flock around to listen to Peach Pit.
When I got mugged on my way back from the greengrocers, I was peach-less!
What do we call the period in between eating a peach? – It is called a pit stop.
A fruit was madly in love, it was peachy–keen.
What do we call a beautiful picture drawn by a peach artist? – It is a great peach of work.
I asked my nectarine friend how she was doing after her break up and she said 'It's the pits, man.'
We are thinking of spending the night at the peach house, by the shore.
The United Nations gave its members a basket of peaches on 21 September - the International Peach Day.
At a restaurant, the peach said, "Hey, I would like a peach of cake for dessert, thank you!"
My mother told me to leave the peach cobbler alone on the table. But I couldn't help but watch the cobbler make the beautiful peach shoes.
What song do young peaches love listening to? 'Papa don't peach'.
The peach sports organization rended a commercial peach for a game of peach ball.
Q: Why did the fruit stop for some time while driving?
A: It wanted to make a quick pit-stop
The kindergarten kids were taught the alphabet and peach sounds at school.
Did you hear about the scientist that studied nectarines? He won the Nobel Peach Prize.
What do they do when the fruit educator is sick? They bring in a substitute peacher.
Q: What’s a nectarine?
A: A peach with balding problems.
A sad peach can be really pit-iful, sometimes.
Unlike peaches, nectarines don't have any fuzz, because they suffer from Alo-peach-ea.
An inspirational speaker came to speak at the fruit stand today. He told us to peach for the stars.
It is a great idea to ask peaches to make your shoes. After all, they make excellent cobblers.
The peach couple from school is totally in love. They seem so perfect for peach other.
Q: Why could the fruits not see anything?
A: It was peach black there.
Q: What would a peach love to pet?
A: A Pit Bull.
Q: What do you call a really violent fruit?
A: A peach breaker
While leaving, the peach friend told his sad buddy, "If you need any help, just peach out, I will be there."
If you are wondering about a peach's favorite game, it's peach ball.
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
What was the Peach's favorite surf band from the 60's? The Peach Boys.
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
The retiring orchard gardener made a farewell peach that was really heart-warming.
Americans were preparing peach gelatos, to demonstrate it's right to freeze peach!
Those people are preparing peach gelato because they want to demonstrate their rights to freeze peach!
I went to watch a play and there were so many peach errors in the dialogues.
Why did the peach go to the therapist? It was in a pit of despair.
Wondering about a peach's favorite movie? Well it has to be the 'King's Peach'.
I heard that my neighbor, who loved dried fruit, has passed away. May his soul rest in peach.
What do fruit wear when they go swimming? A one-peach bathing suit.
If you are wondering about a peach's favorite video game, well it's definitely 'Super Princess Peach'.
In the last peach race, I put $30 peach way on two new racers.
If you are wondering about the fuzziest character in the gaming world, well it is definitely Princess Peach.
I just hear that the woman who lives next door and loves fruit died. I hope she would rest in peach.
My banana grandad got in an accident last year, he bruised like a peach!
Why did the man continue to eat whole peaches? Because he has a bottomless pit.
The IT peach-guy is an expert in the field of peach synthesis.
The peach started acting all funny because it was really fuzzy.