What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
Did you hear about the man who used to be addicted to eating raw meat? Don't worry, he's cured now!
What would you call a steak that leaped off the table and ran away? Fast food, of course.
My friend was totally addicted to the cold meat section in our local supermarket. It got so bad, they had to quit cold turkey.
I tried to change my email password to “beef stew” the other day. It was refused because it was not stroganoff.
You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...
Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye
What do you call a cow in a rooster costume? Roost beef.
What is a cow's favorite deli meat? Bull-ogna!
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
I’m bacon you! Please stop with the meat puns!
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
Did you hear about the butcher who got into danger? His life was at steak!
How do you defeat a meat-loving vampire? With a steak to the heart!
Sheep have a clever way of keeping all their four feet warm in the winter; they wear muttons.
What is a butcher’s favorite Elvis Presley song? Love Meat Tenders.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
Why are burgers bad at telling jokes? Because they all are cheesy.
What do you call seasoned and dried robot meat?
Beep chirpy
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a cow? Roost beef!
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?”
You really ate dog meat? How was it?
.... ruff
No one likes sausage puns, they are the wurst!
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
What do you call meat balls falling from the sky? A meat-ior shower.
Have you heard about the new meat that’s taking the world by storm? It’s a cross between a cow and a chicken. They call it “roost beef”.
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
What cut of meat do you get from an extremely tired butcher?
A filet mid-yawn
Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
Some people think anyone who sells meat is gross. But, people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.
So, could you brown it up a bit?
What is a snowman’s favorite type of burger? A chilli cheese burger with iceberg lettuce.
I met a chicken once; she was desperate to join a band. She even had her own drumsticks.
They were building a meat tower next door.
The steaks just kept getting higher.
What's the most musical cut of chicken? The drumstick!
As a butcher, let me advise you never to back up into the meat grinder. It will make you get a little behind in your work.
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
Hot dog, I love a good meat pun.
What's the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
I’ve been told that I need to stop making puns about meat… But I just can’t stop cold turkey.
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
Did you see the award-winning movie about a hot dog? It was an Oscar wiener!
Have you heard about the pig who killed his own farmer? He did it to save his bacon.
Why did the cow and the bull become so close? Because they became beef-friends.
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
What is a hair stylist's favorite steak? A flat iron!
Meat cutters are really no good at stand up comedy; they tend to butcher all the best jokes.
Why did the butcher work overtime at the grocery store? To make ends meat!
The butcher’s life was at steak when the meat market caught fire.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
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