Why didn't the butcher cross the road? He didn't want to brisket!
Why did the butcher work overtime at the grocery store? To make ends meat!
Some people think anyone who sells meat is gross. But, people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
They were building a meat tower next door.
The steaks just kept getting higher.
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
Did you hear about the farmer who sold his sheep to slaughter because he wasn't making enough money from the wool? The situation went from baa-d to wurst!
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
Our local butcher had to go to the doctor the other day. He didn’t know what was wrong, but said that he was feeling offal.
What is a hair stylist's favorite steak? A flat iron!
A con artist tried to convince me he could ejaculate deli meat
What a load of bologna.
What is the best way to cook alligator meat? With a croc pot!
Why was the burger sad? Because he had the blue cheese.
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...
Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye
What do you call seasoned and dried robot meat?
Beep chirpy
Cows love music. In fact, they even have a favourite note: beef flat.
What’s the best part of a cow? The topside, of course.
Are you a big fan of beef? I am. In fact, I could eat it until the cows come home.
Where do cows go to celebrate New Years Eve? To a meat ball!
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Some people have to stop telling meat puns, because they simply butcher every single joke.
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
I’ve been told that I need to stop making puns about meat… But I just can’t stop cold turkey.
How do you defeat a meat-loving vampire? With a steak to the heart!
Have you ever tried kangaroo meat? I have. It was tasty, but it made me a bit jumpy.
What do butchers say after they meet someone new? “Mince to meat you.”
What did the skeleton order for lunch? Spare ribs!
No one likes sausage puns, they are the wurst!
What did the boss pig say to the pig worker for not working fast enough? “chop chop slow pork”.
Have you heard about the pig who killed his own farmer? He did it to save his bacon.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
Did you hear about the butcher who got into danger? His life was at steak!
Which is a meat patty's least favourite day of the week? Fry-day!
Why did the hamburger dress up as a computer? Because he wanted to be a Big Mac.
Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
You might be startled to see a hamburger working out in your local gym. Don’t worry, they’re just there because they want better buns.
I met a chicken once; she was desperate to join a band. She even had her own drumsticks.
What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work!
Did you hear about the butcher that backed into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
Make no bones about it, home made stock is a really good base for soups.
If anyone gets a suspicious email from me about canned meat, don’t open it. It’s spam!
It is really rare to find the most perfectly cooked steak.
Digital burgers are nothing but processed meat.
Why did the pig become an actress? Because she was a real ham!
I’m bacon you! Please stop with the meat puns!
Why are burgers bad at telling jokes? Because they all are cheesy.
Go to BabaMail
