The peach couple from school is totally in love. They seem so perfect for peach other.
Shucking takes lots of corn-centration.
If fish is brain food, what do dumb people eat? Noodle soup.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
I didn’t know you could vape a chocolate bar until my wife told me to stop inhaling them.
Why are hot dogs angry? Because they are always getting roasted.
Q: Why were the two green pea plants so close?
A: They had deep roots.
"Sip happens."
Q: Did you hear about the cherry that liked to explode?
A: It was da’ bomb.
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
Breakfasts with my family always feel like a party because they're always making toasts.
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
What does an onion say when you are upset because of it one day? It says, "I am sorry that I made you cry!"
Chopping down other people’s cherry trees is definitely frowned upon. However, you likely won’t get into too much trouble for it – as long as you keep hold of the axe!
What do they call Chris Christie in New Jersey? Cake Boss.
There's no need to cherry your feelings, I know you love me really.
The big play is in seven days, you better work on your peach enhancement techniques.
If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps everyone away.
Kid: Dad, why don’t you approve of the consumption of dairy products?
Dad: Because I was raised lactose intolerant.
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
Q: Why did the fruit finish her homework so quickly?
A: Because the homework was a peach of cake.
When can a pizza marry a hot dog? After a very frank relationship.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
This joke is like the time I slipped and fell into a salad.
Corny on the Cobb.
Why did the FBI surround the president with cows? They were beefing up security!”
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
I've been feeling really down recently so I thought I'd cheer myself up by making a nice cheese and pickle sandwich.
But when I picked up the pickle jar, it said "reject if depressed", so now I'm off to take an overdose.
Where do the best kola nuts come from? Kolafornia.
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese.
But it's only mild.
What do you call young avocados?
Avokiddos.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping onions which made me cry
Onions was a good dog
What do you call a cow that only produces almond milk? One that went nuts.
The United Nations gave its members a basket of peaches on 21 September - the International Peach Day.
Vampires love cookies too, they love No-stake cookies.
What is a corn's favorite song?
Corn fields forever.
What do you call Chewbacca when you have chocolate stuck in your hair?
chocolate chip wookiee.
Mom, what do we have for dinner? I cannot tell you, son, it is a soup-rise! Is it soup? I soup-pose it would be.
What do you call two peas in a pod?
Peepee
What do you get when you cross a goblin and cheese? Muenster cheese.
I got canned from a Orange juice factory...
Just couldn't concentrate.
Before I ducked out to the shops, my wife asked me to put ketchup on the shipping list.
Now I can't read it.
A cream-filled donut and an eclair decided to get a divorce.
It’s a sad story, but the real victims are their children. They’re in for a grueling custardy battle.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What do you drink if you want to freshen your breath? Mint-Tea.
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
I got fruit preserves on my finger.
Doctor said I was jammed.
What do you call who has been electrocuted? You call it anion.
To the person who has been eating all of my mixed nuts.
I'm going to cashew.
What do they call Chris Christie in New Jersey? Cake Boss.
Who is the best kung fu vegetable?
Brocc lee.