If you search for pictures of corn on Google you'll only get stalk pictures.
Why will you never meet an ice cream workaholic?
They know how to chill out.
Can I have some of your avocado?
GUAC NO! I give zero guacs! You need to guac off!
What do you call an ant dipped in chocolate? Decad-ant.
I once saw a guy burn to death after nutting
“He cumbusted”
I tried to make my own condiments but, the recipes change so fast, it's hard to ketchup.
What’s the perfect gift for someone who is always raisin’ the bar? Oatmeal
raisin.
What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his donut?
He was stuffed!
Why doesn't Daniel Tosh eat Hot Dogs? He can't find the zipper
What kind of ice cream to electricians eat?
Shock a lot.
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
How can you tell a wine taster is a newbie?
By the blanc look on her face.
What is the name of the dancing chocolate bar?
Nestle Crunk bar.
My local ice cream man was found dead in his garage covered in strawberry sauce and hundreds and thousands.
Police believe he topped himself.
What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.
What do you get when your dog jumps into the fire pit? A hot dog.
Why did the man put the cake in the freezer? Because his wife told him to ice it!
What do cloves use for money? Garlic "Bread."
How many tacos can an octopus eat?
Ten tacos.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
Why do comedians often start their act with peanut butter jokes? They love to warm up the crown by spreading the laughter.
The pie-maker couldn't eat any more strawberries because she was already stuffed.
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
I tried wild ox milk
Turns out I'm yak-tose intolerant
Who’s an apple’s favorite relative?
Granny.
Q: What do vegetables wish for, more than anything else in the whole world?
A: Peas on earth!
Just found a fly in my beer. I'm feeling buzzed.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
Why was Officer Peanut Butter out in the road? Because he was directing a traffic jam.
So I was standing in the grocery store comparing the prices of a couple packs of hummus when my roommate came up to me and suggest the off brand roasted red pepper kind to which I replied:
"Ya, I'm not really sure about that brand. They seem to be very hit and hummus for me."
He was not impressed.
The peach couple from school is totally in love. They seem so perfect for peach other.
What happened to the pig who liked pineapple? He turned into a porky-pine!
I loved the soup that they served at the local restaurant yesterday. It was simply pho-nomenol.
Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock? Because it was marble cake!
If a crocodile makes shoes, what can you make out of a banana?
Slippers!
A berry funny strawberry candy is called a Laffy taffy.
What did the lovesick pig sing to his girlfriend? Don't go bacon my heart!
How do you kill a salad? You go for the carrot-id artery.
Why can't Superman eat the corn tortillas at taco Tuesday?
He's afraid of that chip tonight.
What did one cheddar cheese say to the other cheddar cheese at prom?
Looking sharp!
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
What do you call an anthropomorphic animal blended in ice cream?
A McFurry
It is a bad film because good ones tend to have created atop day-old soup.
I saw a joke about chocolate bars but it wasn’t that funny So I just snickered.
I’ve been told that I need to stop making puns about meat… But I just can’t stop cold turkey.
What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!
Have you ever tried kangaroo meat? I have. It was tasty, but it made me a bit jumpy.
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