Strawberries are great musicians because they make perfect jam sessions.
The bag of flour was so confused.He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeast-erday.
The peach couple from school is totally in love. They seem so perfect for peach other.
What do the ducks have for dinner? They have Quackers and soup.
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
My brother turned into a vegetable.
I guess now he has fryngers and potatoes.
How does a cookie wish his friends for Christmas? I whisk you a merry Christmas.
A peach biologist was looking for a peach-tree-dish for his upcoming experiment.
What is a hair stylist's favorite steak? A flat iron!
"What do tofu and a dildo have in common?" "They are both meat substitutes!"
He ordered 6 vodkas, 6 beers and 6 lemonades. The bartender asked if he would like a tray.
"No I have enough to carry as it is."
Why did the orange go to the doctor? He wasn’t peeling well.
While breaking up with Princess Peach, Mario said "You are so peachy, I can't take it anymore".
Why did the teapot get in trouble? Because he was Naught-Tea.
Why is corn popular around Halloween?
Because it’s so earie.
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
What’s an orange’s favourite animal? An orange-utan.
What do we call a chicken inside a hot tub? – It is called soup.
I loved the soup that they served at the local restaurant yesterday. It was simply pho-nomenol.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
When you push a strawberry down a hill, you make a strawberry turnover.
What's a woman and a tea bag got in common?
You don't know strong they are till you put them in hot water.
Tobacco companies have made an orange flavored cigarette. They call it “Nico-tang”
How do you catch King Kong? Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana.
Why did the pirate have a pumpkin strapped to his arm?
He was a squash-buckler.
What do you call bacon with salt on it?
Salt and Peppa.
What’s an apple’s favorite movie? Mr and Mr Smith.
What kind of candy never arrives on time? Chocolate
What did the nectarine boxer say to his opponent? "You want a peach of me?"
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
So I asked Satan if he had any milk I could drink...
He told me "No whey in Hell!"
So I was cleaning my spice cabinet...
and now I have a lot of thyme on my hands!
What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
Why is the corn army so dysfunctional?
Cause there are too many Kernels.
How do playful monkeys go down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-ster!
If you are wondering about the most important constitutional right of a peach citizen, well, it's none other than freedom of peach.
What did one cheddar cheese say to the other cheddar cheese at prom?
Looking sharp!
How can you tell if you are in love?
If they stole a pizza your heart.
The student asked the teacher, “Cashew a question?”, and the teacher replied, “Nut now”.
What is the healthiest fruit?
“An orange. It takes Vitamin See!”
What do you call a dog who only eats garlic and onions?
A dog with a bark worse than its bite.
Why does a cow hate artificial milk? Because the substance is pow-dairy.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
I tried to make my own condiments but, the recipes change so fast, it's hard to ketchup.
How do astronauts eat their ice cream? In floats!
Do you know what the common thing between a pineapple and a king is? Both of them wear a crown proudly on their top.
My wife's been on a banana diet.
She hasn't lost any weight, but you should see her climb trees now!
Did you hear about the pear that fell off of the tree and fell to its death?
The damage was irreparable.