Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty.
Strawberries have berry good eyesight because they are packed with a lot of Vitamin See.
The Bee Gees were such fans of onions that they even dedicated a song to it. They named it 'Chives Talking'.
Why did the man lose his job in a fruit packing firm? He kept throwing the bent bananas away.
What's the difference between a pickle and a psychiatrist?
If you don't know, you ought to stop talking to your pickle!
What fruit loves chocolate?
A cocoa nut.
Q: What is a peach’s favorite book?
A: War and Peach
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
I got a packet of onions from the supermarket yesterday. Somehow, by today, all of them have disappeared. Guess this is why the shopkeeper warned me not to buy Bermuda Onions.
What is a strawberry that likes to spin called? A berry-go-round.
Fish taco says why don't you want to taco about it And the nacho says cause I'm nacho friend.
Bacon and eggs walk into a bar.
They take their seat and ask the bartender for two draft beers.
The bartender looks at them and says “sorry guys, we don’t serve breakfast here.”
Dad: Did you hear about the cow that was arrested?
Kids: No.
Dad: He was uddermining the authorities.
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
How far can a mango,
If he's got a license but doesn't avocado ?
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A piZZZZZZa.
How are a car and a bicycle similar?
“You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.”
What’s yellow and swings from cake to cake?
Tarzipan.
When I took a break from having soup, my mom said "Carry on, why did you stoup?"
Did you hear about the guy who overdosed on curry powder? He went into a korma.
I am a peach, and when my husband accompanies me, we are a pear.
“I only like lemons,”
Said Michael zestfully.
Did you hear that the Lemon and the Orange divorced?
The Lemon was very bitter.
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
"Read between the wines."
Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake?
Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom!
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that mango.
What do u get from a perverted apple? Hard Cider.
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
Why did Wonder Woman rescue the Wine?
Because that's what grape lady superheroes do!
Why do donuts hate puns so much?
They donut like to joke around!
What do you call a mislabeled orange juice container?
Pulp fiction.
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
Why was the backstroke done by the squirrel?
“The squirrel preferred to maintain his nuts dry.”
What happened to the pig who liked pineapple? He turned into a porky-pine!
When my friend Frank died, his body was cremated and his ashes were placed in a decorative German beer tankard.
Now he's Frank in stein.
I went to an English camping party with some vegetables. We stayed in a tea-pea.
What does a pirate pay for his corn?
A buccaneer!
What do you call 2000 pounds of Chinese soup? Won Ton.
Tobacco companies have made an orange flavored cigarette. They call it “Nico-tang”
My mum makes the best soups. She is a real soup-erstar.
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
Why should you always bring a bag of tortilla chips to a party?
In queso emergency.
Onions have had a long process in the evolutionary chain. They have evolved into today's onions from onionderthals.
If you eat too many cherries, you can sometimes end up with digestive issues. It really is the pits.
What did the apple say to the almond? You're Nuts!
Q: Why did the fruit go to the salon?
A: To peach her hair blonde.
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