The pecan is ready to come out of its’ shell and see the world.
What do you call an onion who decides to be very eco-friendly in its approach? You name it a green onion.
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
So, what do you do with an epileptic watermelon? Simple, you make a seizure salad.
What do you call a pickle doctor?
A dill pusher.
What do you call leftover lettuce?
The romaines.
Why does salt make everything taste better
Because it's sodi-yummm!
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
What happens when you rub two oranges together?
You get Pulp Friction.
What did the piece of Cheddar say to the ghost? I'm Lac-ghost intolerant
Whenever I give my daughter cherries, she stuffs them in the chair
Now we call them chairries
Why did the clock in the donut shop run slow?
It always went back four seconds
What are the four seasons?
Salt, Pepper, Sugar and Flour.
What do you call a barking pumpkin?
A gourd dog.
Last year, when I went to Texas, I met this very polite and gentle onion. Its name was the Texas supa-sweet onion.
How are a car and a bicycle similar?
“You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.”
What is the wealthiest nut ever?
“A cashooo.”
I recently got told ketchup doesn't actually use tomatoes
But I can't find a reliable sauce on that.
Why did the cherry go to the good drinks factory? It was cordially invited.
The Paddington bears don’t eat lots of marmalade sandwiches because they are already stuffed.
How do you make Ohio State University cookies? Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.
How do you share a piece of cheese with a bear?
Caerphilly.
Why did the cheese lover hide cheese in the back of his fridge?
In queso emergency.
Did you hear about the lowest grade of steak? It's where the rubber meats the road.
I always tend to forget the french word for strawberry sometimes. But, then I eventually remember the fraise.
A lemon got a job in a vinegar factory last week...
Starting salary was $15 per sour.
The guilty conscience of stealing and consuming a whole peach is getting to me. I feel like there's a pit in my gut.
Q: Why couldn’t the orange believe that her friend had let her down?
A: This was because citrus-ted him!
What do vets call a paralyzed squirrel? A busted nut.
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
What did the insulted orange say to the kiwi? Ex-squeeze-me?
It’s too bad the man couldn’t quit his job at the bakery. He really kneaded the dough.
Why did the fruit bat eat the orange?
“Because it had appeal.”
If anyone gets a suspicious email from me about canned meat, don’t open it. It’s spam!
What happens when no one comes to your birthday party? You can have your cake and eat it too.
Why are cherries unassuming? Because they often get made into humble pie.
Went to the doctor because I got a strawberry stuck in my ear
He gave me some cream for it
What do you call a nut that is crazy about exercise? A health nut.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
You know what they say about ice cream parents?
They play flavorites.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
If fish is brain food, what do dumb people eat? Noodle soup.
How do you catch King Kong? Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana.
Did you hear about the ice cream that went to prison?
They got their just desserts.
What can a whole apple do that half an apple can't do? It can look round.
When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.
Why did the monkey like the banana? Because it had appeal!
What does a surprised pumpkin say?
OH MY GOURD!
Why did the burglar break into the bakery? Because he heard the cakes were rich.
Go to BabaMail
