I tried finding the dairy factory last night, but I had no luck. I must have lost my whey.
What do you call an attractive, Jewish lemon with no worldly possessions?
An aesthetic ascetic acidic Hasidic.
I’d like to tell a joke about salt but then said to myself: "Na."
Why was Tony Soprano fat? Cause he thought getting a slice of the pie was a piece of cake.
Why did the FBI surround the president with cows? They were beefing up security!”
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
What does a hippy cherry wear to a festival? A pie dye T-shirt.
What do you call a chicken with a piece of lettuce in its eye? CHICKEN CAESER SALAD.
What do you get when you play Tug-of-War with a pig? Pulled-Pork
What did the banker want from the baker?
To pump her nickels.
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
An organization that citricises its workers cannot get the maximum juice out of them.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
Did you hear what happened to the cheese after its breakup?
It got provolonely.
I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.
What is the cherry fruit's favorite American talkshow? The Cherry Springer Show of course!
What is the difference between a cow that produces normal milk and a cow that produces chocolate milk?
A mootation
Why did the coffee call the police? Because it was mugged.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
The spoiled milk always got what it wanted.
What do you call a musical lime?
John Lemon.
Most of the fruits usually drink their juice with a straw-berry.
A strawberry usually gets stuck often when it gets jammed.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
I have to spill my guts, I love Halloween!
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
Q: What’s red and goes up and down, up and down?
A: A cherry in a lift.
What kind of candy makes fun of you? Tootsie Trolls.
What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.
What did the coffee say to its date? Hey there, hot stuff.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Why was there peanut butter in the middle of the road?
It went with the traffic jam.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What do you call an onion who wants to go on romantic dates in Paris? A French onion.
What’s that green head of something that is the main part of a salad?
Lettuce think about it.
Why shouldn't you shoot pool using a pickle?
Because you'll find the cue cumbersome.
hat’s the most sophisticated kind of bread?
The upper crust.
What do all the onions decide to do over unfair wages? They decide to form a labor onion.
What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
My girlfriend said we aren't getting married until she has a pear shape
It's the reason we cantaloupe
When the little boy was baking a cake why did it run away? Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it!
Somebody was doing a speech and said, "This might be corny," and pulled out a couple of canned corns. Guess what happened next?
Total pundemonium.
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
The worst type of criminal is he who mugs other people's coffee.
Do not be sad because of these bad words. You are always a fineapple in my heart.
Why are bread puns the greatest? They never grow mold.
My doctor tells me I've got a bacon addiction.
Thankfully he thinks I can be cured.
What happens if you swallow a whole corn cob?
You get corn-stipated!
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