When I refused to have the soup, my sister said "People who do not have soup are stew-pid".
What kind of cheese to beavers eat?
Edam.
What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg? Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).
A lemon says to an orange, “What are you up to?”
The orange replies, “Not much. Just hanging ‘round.”
Did you hear what happened between the cook and the onion?
I think there was a fight. It got a little dicey and tears were shed.
What do you call a cold little taco?
A brrr-ito.
When should you go on a cheese diet? If you need to cheddar a few pounds
What do you call a punctual citrus fruit?
A Clockwork Orange.
"You can't sip with us."
Have you heard about the pig who killed his own farmer? He did it to save his bacon.
Lettuce stop these governmental leeks.
Q: Why did no one like peach’s personality?
A: Because it had a heart of stone.
What do you give to a sick lemon?
lemonaid.
I am soup-er into the beautiful girl that I met yesterday at school.
My doctor told me "No more spicy food.", but I decided to have one last fennel fling.
What do we call a plumb pineapple? It is called a pineapple chunk!
What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?
Strawberries.
What do athletes drink before games? Sport-Tea.
What do you call an onion who decides to be very eco-friendly in its approach? You name it a green onion.
A never-ending natural supply of beer?
Hops springs eternal.
Why does the cookie monster fear the gingerbread man? Because he’s one tough cookie.
Why shouldn't you buy illegal seasonings? It's always a shady dill.
Why does everyone invite ice cream to the party?
It’s cool.
What do you get when you put Cola in an oven?
Baking soda.
The spoiled milk always got what it wanted.
Who is the funniest fruit around? Cherry Seinfeld.
What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat
How do comedians like their eggs?
Funny side up.
The United Nations gave its members a basket of peaches on 21 September - the International Peach Day.
What happens when you buy too much ice cream?
Breyer’s remorse.
If you want day-old soup, then come back here tomorrow!
In the corn maze, I felt like I was being stalked. It was earie.
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
What do all the onions decide to do over unfair wages? They decide to form a labor onion.
What did the salt say when the phosphate asked to bond with it?
"NaCl ater."
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
What's a woman and a tea bag got in common?
You don't know strong they are till you put them in hot water.
Why did Eve want to leave the garden of Eden and move to New York ? She fell for the Big Apple !
Taco Bell overcooked my food
I asked for a brrrr-ito and an en-chill-ata.
What do you call a dog with a fever? A hot dog.
Why do donuts hate puns so much?
They donut like to joke around!
What did the pepperoni say to the cook?
You wanna pizza me?
When you push a strawberry down a hill, you make a strawberry turnover.
What is the cherry fruit's favorite American talkshow? The Cherry Springer Show of course!
What did the Mama Hot Dog say to the little frankfurter? Ketch-up! Why did the blonde put a sweater on her hot dog? Because she wanted a chili dog.
I love having dinner in a local restaurant. It has a soup-erb speciality that mixes soup and herbs.
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
What do you call a cow who’s just given birth?
De-calf-inated!
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