Why did the watermelon go crazy?
“He lost his rind.”
Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese.
Wholey-grain! You really bread my mind!
If you can't get Swine Flu from eating bacon what can you get? A1: Obesity A2: Heart Disease A3: Hardening of the Arteries.
This is a taco and burrito conversation.
Nachos.
What do you get if a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
They were building a meat tower next door.
The steaks just kept getting higher.
Ugh.. I ate too much hummus..
And now I filafel.
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
Are avocados good for your heart?
Yes, they make for great avo-cardio.
What makes the soup of a dragon so delicious is the addition of firecrackers.
What is ice cream’s preferred breed of dog?
Dashchundae.
What did Gorgonzola say to Cheddar? Lookin' Sharp.
What do you call the greatest cheese to every live on the earth? Legen-dairy!
"Will you accept this rosé?"
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
This year I'm carving my pumpkin to look like an intricate ball of rope, so it can be a gourd-ian knot.
What is a cow's favorite lunch meat? Bullogna
Did I invite you to the Barbecue?
Then why are you all up in my grill?
What’s another name for a chess-nut? A nut who loves chess.
The mama nut told her children to kick off their dirty cashews before stepping into the house.
You knead me in your loaf.
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
Q: How do two cherries make up after an argument?
A: They cherry the hatchet.
What is a cannibal's favourite cheese? Limburger
The pie-maker couldn't eat any more strawberries because she was already stuffed.
Lettuce stop these governmental leeks.
What do you call a magician nut?
“An individual who is able to turn into a nut.”
When you finish the lemons that life gives you;
Sublime.
How does the recipe for German chocolate cake begin? First, invade ze kitchen.
How does a cookie wish his friends for Christmas? I whisk you a merry Christmas.
Where do astronauts buy their milk? From the milky way!!!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
A strawberry will never help another strawberry because they tend to always get into jams.
What did the cheese say to the other cheese? I smell something swiss-picious!
Why did the peanut take everything off its wall? It didn’t want any walnuts.
How do you know the French Onion is Canadian?
Because the oignon est!
What kind of beer can you make from a potato?
Spud Light.
I saw a road sign the other day that said "Dip In Road"
I turned the corner and drove straight into a load of hummus
What do you call a strawberry in math?
A berry-able.
Apples and oranges had a conversation one day. Guess what the apples were saying the oranges, nothing stupid, apples don’t talk.
Why did the orange cry?
Someone hurt its peelings.
What do you call real bacon?
Genuswine
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
How do monkeys get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror ? Halloumi (Hello me)
My Dad told me why Busch is the only brand of beer he ever drinks.
"It's the only beer that says it's name when you open it."
Did you hear that the Lemon and the Orange divorced?
The Lemon was very bitter.
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
Q: Why did the pea sell his car?
A: The back seat didn’t have enough legume.
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