What do you do when your partner drinks your coffee? I don't know, but that's certainly grounds for divorce.
What's a coffee's favorite karaoke song? Hit Me With your Best Shot.
What do baristas say to their least-favorite customers? You mocha me crazy.
Why was the coffee-shop worker fired? He kept showing up in a Tea-shirt.
What's the best Beatles' song to play at a coffee shop? Latte Be.
How are guys just like coffee?
The best ones are rich, hot, and can keep you up all night!
Avoid discussing coffee in sensitive company. It can make for a heated and strong debate.
Everyone makes fun of him for using old coffee, but he insists it has the greatest sedimental value.
The hipster burnt his tongue. He sipped his coffee before it was cool.
What did the two coffee lovers say on their wedding day? We were meant to bean together.
She drank so much coffee at work, she considered it part of her daily grind.
Why did the coffee bean keep checking his watch? Because he was pressed for time.
Why should you avoid discussing coffee around sensitive people?
It can lead to a really heated, strong debate.
Did you hear about the guy who put little G.I. Joe soldiers at the bottom of his coffee cup?
He’d heard that the best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!
How is divorce like espresso? It's bitter and expensive.
You may want to seek help if you feel despresso when you don't have coffee.
The worst type of criminal is he who mugs other people's coffee.
How does the serial killer like his coffee?
How he likes his women—all ground up.
I do some of my best thinking over coffee. I tend to have a latte on my mind.
What did the caffeine addict name his cats?
Cream and Sugar.
She was a little hesitant to try the new caramel flavor, but she decided to give it a shot, anyway.
What did the coffee lover name his son?
Joe, obviously.
What’s the opposite of coffee?
Sneezy.
What's a barista's favorite morning mantra? Rise and grind.
How do you make Pig Jerky?
Give them some coffee.
What do you call a sad cup of coffee? A depresso.
You spilled your entire cup of coffee? What's sumatra with you?
She'll take whatever beans necessary to get her daily cup of coffee. Whatever. Beans. Necessary.
Why did the coffee call the police? Because it was mugged.
And what's its favorite Bob Marley song? Don't Worry, Be Frappé.
What’s fat, hairy and drinks a lot of coffee?
Java the Hut!
What do you call a cow who’s just given birth?
De-calf-inated!
A man went to his psychiatrist and complained that every time he drink coffee, he would get a stabbing pain in his right eye.
The psychiatrist said, “Well, have you tried taking the spoon out?”
How does Moses make coffee?
Hebrews it.
Don't talk to him before he's had his espresso or he'll lose his tamper.
Last night I was kidnapped by Aliens. They forced to work providing teas and coffees on their spaceship.
I told one alien that I couldn't find any milk. He said "In space, no one can. Here, use cream."
What do you call it when you walk into a coffee shop and feel like you've been there before? Déja-brew.
What’s the difference between a Starbucks latte and a whore?
Nothing, they both suck and empty your wallet!
What did the coffees say before their night out? Let's stir up some trouble.
What's a coffee's favorite spell? Espresso Patronum.
How did Henry VIII like his coffee? Decap.
How is coffee better than a woman?
It goes down way easier.
The pot of coffee he just made is basically break fluid.
What did the coffee addict say to his doctor?
I don’t have a problem with coffee. I have a problem without it!
How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.
Italians are so good at making coffee because they naturally like to espresso themselves.
What did the coffee say about its late assignment? Better latte than never.
What do chocolate, men, and coffee have in common?
They’re only good if they’re rich!
How did the coffee show its love? It said, "Words cannot espresso how much you bean to me."
What happens when two coffee lovers disagree on their favorite roast? It turns into a heated debate.
Go to BabaMail
