Nowadays oranges have decided to go out with prune. The reason is that it is becoming so hard to find a date.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
Why was red in awe of orange?
“Because orange blue green.”
What do oranges like to listen to?
Musical com-peel-ations.
Why don’t oranges go around blind?
“Because they take Vitamin See!”
Apple and orange were the only two left that evening. Everyone else had dates.
Last night I dreamt I was swimming in a sea of oranges. I guess it was just a Fanta-sea!
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
What rhymes with orange?
No, it doesn’t.
Why did the lemon like the orange? He’s not from concentrate.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?
“Lack of concentration.”
Despite the pun being so orange-inal, it wasn’t all that funny.
Apples and oranges had a conversation one day. Guess what the apples were saying the oranges, nothing stupid, apples don’t talk.
Why did the orange lose the race?
“Because it got Im-peached.”
Hap-pea-ness is when you and your friend are like two peas in a pod.
Why was the orange skeptical of everyone around him?
He was planted with a seed of doubt.
What do you get when you cross an orange with a parrot? A carrot.
What happened when the orange broke out of prison?
All heck broke juice.
Why couldn’t the orange dance in the talent show without his partner?
Because it takes two to “tang-o.”
What did the orange do the night before the exam?
He put his nose to the “g-rind-stone” and read the entire textbook.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad to see me?
The best punishment to give orange kids is getting them canned. This is the only way to prevent them from going bad.
Q: What happens when two oranges collide?
A: They get en-tang-led!
Why did the orange get insurance?
Zest in case.
What did the orange say before he started his new job?
“The zest is yet to come!”
When I was in grade school, one of my best friends spoke Mandarin. One day, he introduced me to his parents and I told them I don’t speak orange.
The next person that asks me for pineapple juice, cranberry juice, lemonade, and a slice of orange all in the same glass is gonna get a “punch.
The least favorite day for an orange is a juice day.
Why did the citrus fruit join the military?
“Because it was a navel orange.”
It peels nice to be voted in as the most appeeling model in the contest.
You shouldn’t put orange slices in your beer. Well, maybe once in a Blue Moon.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to open the door.
What do you get when an Elephant sits on an Orange?
Orange squash.
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
Why did the orange get pulled over while driving?
He kept peeling out.
Which language do oranges use to speak to each other? Mandarin.
The Paddington bears don’t eat lots of marmalade sandwiches because they are already stuffed.
Why was the orange the valedictorian of her class?
She was the zest in class.
What are the longest lasting relationships in the fruit world? Orange-d marriages.
What happened when an orange, an apple, and a banana all went on a picnic together?
They had a “fruit-ful” day.
He apologized for driving the orange to the edge of the blade
Why did the orange’s musical number receive a bad review?
Because it wasn’t an “orange-inal.”
An apple and an orange signed up for a tournament. No one was really surprised when they had both were seeded.
The favorite drink for batman is a fruit punch.
When you come across oranges wearing suntan lotion, don’t judge them harshly. They do so in order not to peel.
An organization that citricises its workers cannot get the maximum juice out of them.
Why did the orange help the old lady cross the road?
To do a random act of rindness.
What did the orange say when a knife pierced it’s peel? Flesh wound.
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