No one likes sausage puns, they are the wurst!
Why did the FBI surround the president with cows? They were beefing up security!”
Did you hear about the butcher that backed into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
What cut of meat do you get from an extremely tired butcher?
A filet mid-yawn
What did the skeleton order for lunch? Spare ribs!
If you’re looking for Valentine’s Day inspiration for a meat loving crush, try “Will you beef my Valentine?”
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
You really ate dog meat? How was it?
.... ruff
Why was the burger sad? Because he had the blue cheese.
Have you ever tried kangaroo meat? I have. It was tasty, but it made me a bit jumpy.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef!
The other day I asked an Alaskan guy if he wanted to eat some seal meat.
He wasn’t really inuit
What do you call a steak hurtling through space? A meat-ior!
Why did the pig become an actress? Because she was a real ham!
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
Meat cutters are really no good at stand up comedy; they tend to butcher all the best jokes.
Did you hear about the farmer who sold his sheep to slaughter because he wasn't making enough money from the wool? The situation went from baa-d to wurst!
What is a butcher’s favorite Elvis Presley song? Love Meat Tenders.
What do butchers say after they meet someone new? “Mince to meat you.”
Where do cows go to celebrate New Years Eve? To a meat ball!
I love meat. I think going vegetarian would be a big missed steak.
What is a cow's favorite deli meat? Bull-ogna!
Did you see the award-winning movie about a hot dog? It was an Oscar wiener!
What did the lovesick pig sing to his girlfriend? Don't go bacon my heart!
Why didn't the butcher cross the road? He didn't want to brisket!
What do you call a pig that practices karate? A pork chop!”
My local restaurant recently lost out on an entire order of the best local beef. No one has herd what happened to it.
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?”
What did the boss pig say to the pig worker for not working fast enough? “chop chop slow pork”.
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
What do you call hot dogs in winter? Chilly dogs!
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
The cow intestine dish was offal, but the pig organ tacos was grocer!
Why did the hamburger dress up as a computer? Because he wanted to be a Big Mac.
What do you call seasoned and dried robot meat?
Beep chirpy
I have a friend who has been diagnosed with a phobia of sausages. She always fears the wurst.
What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work!
What's the most musical cut of chicken? The drumstick!
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Did you hear about the butcher who got into danger? His life was at steak!
What do you call meat balls falling from the sky? A meat-ior shower.
What is the most affordable type of meat? Deer, it is always under a buck a pound.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
A con artist tried to convince me he could ejaculate deli meat
What a load of bologna.
Did you hear about the man who used to be addicted to eating raw meat? Don't worry, he's cured now!
What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
What’s the best thing about being a butcher? You get to meat the best people.
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
They were building a meat tower next door.
The steaks just kept getting higher.
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