Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Why are you eating a banana with the skin on? Oh, it's all right. I know what's inside.
Even though Jake was a heartthrob Casanova, he just had to break up with his long-time watermelon vending girlfriend; said she was always melondramatic about everything.
If you are wondering about a peach's favorite game, it's peach ball.
It was the pie piper who had led the strawberries to the bakery.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
I just watched someone try to steal a pumpkin from a bull.
He got gourd.
Wondering about a peach's favorite sci-fi novel? It's 'When You Peach Me'.
I got arrested for the way I eat corn.
They charged me with a salt and buttery.
I hope for world peas.
Why did he skeleton go to the barbecue? To get another rib.
Why did the hipster burn his lips?
He ate his pizza before it was cool.
What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?
Strawberries.
The oranges have great eyesight because they always keep their eyes peeled.
Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
I once saw an onion that had been preserved for ages. It was an Egyptian onion.
This special peach school is for those Peach kids who are suffering from peach and hearing impairment.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
What do you call an attractive, Jewish lemon with no worldly possessions?
An aesthetic ascetic acidic Hasidic.
Although many other vegetables live above the ground, onions live underground. This is because they have many lairs.
What did the ice cream cone write on his valentine card?
You make me melt.
Did you hear about the guy who overdosed on curry powder? He went into a korma.
How many grams of protein are there in that slice of chocolate pie? 3.14159265.
Most of the fruits usually drink their juice with a straw-berry.
What do you give a horse that has just won the Kentucky Derby? An Appletini.
Last year, when I went to Texas, I met this very polite and gentle onion. Its name was the Texas supa-sweet onion.
What do you call a barking pumpkin?
A gourd dog.
What do you call a cup of leaf juice that doesn’t want to be a dad?
Absent-tea parent.
He was showing off his new gaming gadget, "it has the latest peach recognition technology" he said.
Why do ice cream cones make such bad athletes?
They always get licked.
In a romantic date, Romeo says to Juliette “Baby! You are the pineapple of my eyes!”
What do you get when you drink milk
A moostache
What did the cherry say when it won its third Olympic gold medal? That's just the cherry on top of a successful career.
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?
Michael Gourdan.
Why are bread puns the greatest? They never grow mold.
How does white chocolate turn into dark chocolate?
Turn off the lights.
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
Why should you make a cherry pie for someone that you miss? Because absence bakes the heart grow fonder.
The bowl of soup you bought yesterday from the Chinese restaurant was souper terrible.
Why did the strawberry get bruised? Because it was under pear pressure.
"You had me at merlot."
I was straining some old noodles but eventually, I chickened out. It was such a broth-er.
What did the steak say when he came across his nemesis? Ah, we meat again!”
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What's the most popular American cheese sitcom? Curd Your Enthusiasm
What do you call bananas who are friends with monkeys? A bunch of idiots.
Say this aloud: Eye Yam Stew Peed
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
What's yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana.
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